Heal Your Relationships

So many of us think that permanent healing is not available to us.

We think that we are stuck feeling how we feel forever, and there is nothing we can do about it.

But my friends, this is not true.

Permanent healing is possible for you.

But to access it, you need to stop sticking Band-Aids on to temporarily fix the problem, and start focusing on the deeper work.

Sticking Band-Aids on the problem won’t help, in fact, it will often make the problem worse.

Trust me – I know.

I’ve done it myself.

So this week, I’m sharing a concept with you called No More Band-Aids and showing you how to use it to access complete, permanent healing and start to live a joyful, free, and happy life.

Discover three ingredients that lead to permanent healing and how to use them to build authentic, meaningful relationships, and why permanent healing is fully available to you, no matter what you have gone through in your life.

In This Episode:

02:15 Here’s what I‘m talking about in today’s episode…

03:23 Sometimes Band-Aids make things worse. Here’s why..

06:55 Find out why complete healing is possible for you

07:59 Three ingredients that I’ve found to be essential to permanent healing and what each of them mean

10:15 What IFS is and how it ties into what I’m teaching you today

11:04 I’m sharing some of the protective mechanisms we develop in order to survive

12:23 A very basic, high-level introduction into Internal Family Systems

16:24 Learn how I use a combination of polyvagal theory and somatic experiencing in my work

17:25 Even when you heal, your psyche and your body will still keep you in trauma loops. Here’s why…

19:55 The final part to the three ingredients of permanent healing

21:30 Relationships are a mirror of what is happening inside of us

21:55 Here’s another thing that complicates trauma recovery

24:42 Learn why just one of these three ingredients is not enough for healing

25:08 This is what true, permanent healing is and why it’s possible for you

Connect with Dr. Kavetha Sundaramoorthy:

●  Rapid Relationship Repair FREE Mini-Course - https://bit.ly/RapidRelationshipRepair

●  Come join us in our free Facebook group Your Brain on Trauma, where is a whole community of women just like you who are on this sacred healing journey: https://www.facebook.com/groups/rm4fp/

●  Sign up to my live event: The Clearing: https://bit.ly/TheClearingLIVE

●  Want more information about The Clearing? Email me or DM me on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kavetha.sundaramoorthy

Resources mentioned:

·       The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk M.D.: https://www.amazon.com/Body-Keeps-Score-Healing-Trauma/dp/0143127748/

We generally talk about hope as something that is positive, lovely, and healing.

But hope is only a good thing if it is encouraging you to take personal responsibility and action in your life.

So what about when it doesn’t?

What about when hope is actually toxic?

Relying on hope alone is one of the biggest reasons for suffering in this world. It’s a copout.

And the sooner you understand this, the sooner you can approach what I call the messy middle, and the sooner you can truly heal.

That’s why you’re here, right?

In this episode of Your Brain on Trauma, I’m showing you why you already have everything you need to be able to face the messy middle and why doing so is such an integral part of your healing journey.

Discover the problem with relying solely on hope in your life and find out exactly what it takes to heal from the inside out, have better relationships, and pass on a legacy that is better than the one you inherited.

In This Episode:

03:50 Just helping people isn’t good enough nowadays. This is what I want to be doing instead…

05:57 What I’m talking about today might ruffle your feathers. Here’s why…

06:23 Learn one of the biggest reasons for suffering in this world

08:49 Here’s something I’ve seen play out so many times in my own life and relationships

12:20 I’m sharing an example of how toxic hope has shown up in my own family

14:11 Many of us allow ourselves to get stuck because we don’t want to face the messy middle. This is why that’s such a problem…

15:36 A real-life example of toxic hope from one of my clients

19:38 You HAVE to be willing to face the messy middle. Here’s why…

22:05 The truth will always come out eventually

22:29 Here’s what you need to do if you want to truly heal…

Connect with Dr. Kavetha Sundaramoorthy:

●      Rapid Relationship Repair FREE Mini-Course - https://bit.ly/RapidRelationshipRepair

●      Come join us in our free Facebook group Your Brain on Trauma, where is a whole community of women just like you who are on this sacred healing journey: https://www.facebook.com/groups/rm4fp/

●      Sign up to my live event: The Clearing: https://bit.ly/TheClearingLIVE

●      Want more information about The Clearing? DM me on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kavetha.sundaramoorthy

Have you ever had a conversation with somebody that left you instantly moved?

Maybe it gave you a new way of seeing things or explained why somebody behaves in a certain way.

Maybe it gave you a different perspective that you would never have otherwise considered.

We have so many conversations throughout our lives, but only a select few truly stay with us.

Only a select few have the power to change our entire way of being and showing up in the world.

The transformational gifts that come from these conversations are priceless.

In this episode, I’m sharing 6 conversations that have completely changed and transformed my life in the hope that they will inspire you to remember and savor such moments of grace and beauty in your own life, no matter how fleeting they might be.

I am so excited to share these conversations with you, and show you how they helped me navigate my life, what they have taught me in terms of approaching day-to-day life and relationships, and how they can help you navigate whatever you are facing in your own life.

In This Episode:

03:00 Find out what I’ll be sharing with you today

04:00 Are you ready to truly, permanently heal? Here’s what you can expect from an event I’m running on March 4th, 5th, and 6th, 2023  

05:50 The first conversation that changed my life, a gift from my best friend

10:24 Hear how my worldview and view of myself changed due to this one conversation

11:34 The second conversation that changed my life, a new way of thinking about my status as an immigrant

16:14 The third conversation that changed how I show up, and what it taught me about my dad

20:32 The fourth conversation, and how it altered the way I make decisions in life

24:57 Sometimes wisdom comes from unlikely places. Here’s the fifth conversation, one with my 3-year-old daughter

28:14 The final conversation I want to share with you and how it has changed the way I approach relationships

32:36 Learn what I want you to take from these conversations and why I shared them with you

33:33 Reviews are podcast gold. Please leave us one and help more women on their healing journeys

Connect with Dr. Kavetha Sundaramoorthy:

• Rapid Relationship Repair FREE Mini-Course - https://bit.ly/RapidRelationshipRepair
• Come join us in our free Facebook group Your Brain on Trauma, where is a whole community of women just like you who are on this sacred healing journey: https://www.facebook.com/groups/rm4fp/
• Sign up to my live event: The Clearing: https://bit.ly/TheClearingLIVE
• Want more information about The Clearing? DM me on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kavetha.sundaramoorthy

White lies. We’re surrounded by them and people telling them.

Our loved ones do it, our workplaces do it, our kids do it, and we do it.

We think they’re harmless.

But are they really?

White lies can often feel like the easier, and sometimes more kind, ethical option. Trust me – I know. I used to be the queen of white lies.

But then I realized they were a problem.

In this episode, hear some of the ways I used to tell white lies, the effects these had upon my life in general, and how to spot where you’re doing the same in your own life.

Find out why the white lies you commit every day takes you further away from your true self, and how telling them robs you of internal integrity, relationships, and the potential for honesty and growth.

In This Episode:

04:36 Find out what we’re going to be talking about in today’s episode

05:02 Here are some examples of the white lies many of us tell our kids

06:02 Are white lies a problem? Here’s what I think…

09:11 Find out why re-examining my relationship with white lies was one of the most important levers in my healing journey

10:11 The white lies you commit every day takes you further away from yourself. Here’s why…

11:33 Where is the line between a lie and a white lie?

12:39 Hear everything that telling white lies robs you of

13:04 I’m sharing how I think about integrity and why it is so powerful

14:29 Where do YOU tend to speak white lies?

16:03 My challenge for you

17:30 This is how healing happens…

Connect with Dr. Kavetha Sundaramoorthy:

●      Rapid Relationship Repair FREE Mini-Course - https://bit.ly/RapidRelationshipRepair

●      Come join us in our free Facebook group Your Brain on Trauma, where is a whole community of women just like you who are on this sacred healing journey: https://www.facebook.com/groups/rm4fp/

●      Sign up to my live event: The Clearing: https://bit.ly/TheClearingLIVE

Most of us have been exposed to the upside of unconditional support.

It feels fuzzy, lovely, and warm; it’s ideal.

But as much as I’m a huge fan of creating safety in relationships, I am NOT a fan of unconditional support.

What?!

Why would I believe in emotional safety, but not unconditional support?

There was a time in my life when I had unconditional support, but it actually hindered my growth and healing journey.

There is a difference between unconditional safety and unconditional support.

This week, I’m sharing what that difference is, and a personal experience that brought this home for me in my own life.

Discover the most efficient way to permanent healing and how to apply this to your parenting, relationships, or any other area of your life.

In This Episode:

02:05 Healed individuals create a ripple effect. Here’s how…

03:14 Find out why I’m not a fan of unconditional support

03:30 An update on the in-person retreat originally planned for February 2023

05:12 I’m sharing a story that brought this home for me in my own life

07:35 I loved going to therapy, but it wasn’t always helping me with my growth. This is why…

09:43 Growth cannot happen in THIS circumstance…

13:50 This is something that a lot of coaches and therapists do not understand...

15:34 Want to know if learning has happened? This is the ONLY way…

16:08 The reason many of us are in and out of therapy for decades

Connect with Dr. Kavetha Sundaramoorthy:

• Rapid Relationship Repair FREE Mini-Course - https://bit.ly/RapidRelationshipRepair
• Come join us in our free Facebook group Your Brain on Trauma, where is a whole community of women just like you who are on this sacred healing journey: https://www.facebook.com/groups/rm4fp/
• Sign up for the retreat in February here: https://bit.ly/TheClearingLIVE

Did you know that the language you use affects your entire experience and perception of life?

Well, my loved ones, it does.

Whether it’s the self-talk you have running in the background of your mind or the things you say to other people, the words you use can have a profound effect on your journey.

So ask yourself, is the language you are using serving you and your relationships?

It has been proven that making just one simple shift in the language you use is equal to or better than medication or CBT for mild to moderate depression. 

This shift is readily available to you right now.

So in this week’s episode, I’m here to share the power of language and the spoken word and help you to start using it more powerfully and intentionally in your life.

Find out why your inner and outer use of language is such a powerful lever in your journey of healing, growth, and creating better relationships, and discover a powerful exercise you can do right now to develop an awareness of how the language you use is impacting your life.

In This Episode:

01:22 An invitation from me to you to pause and truly check in with yourself and acknowledge how you’re feeling

04:13 THIS is one of the best ways to look at how you currently use language…

06:58 A second way you can learn to acknowledge the language you use

08:32 The third and final way to help you get curious about your language

10:51 These are the patterns we are looking for when doing the exercise I’m teaching you in this episode…

12:57 Discover a big factor in trauma that also contributes to a relapse in anxiety and depression

13:57 It’s normal to have some pronouns and black-and-white thinking in your language, as well as sense of helplessness. Here’s why…

15:02 Could you be more susceptible to going into anxiety or depression? Here’s a powerful way you can tell…

16:27 There is no better and easier access than language. Here’s why…

Connect with Dr. Kavetha Sundaramoorthy:

Rapid Relationship Repair FREE Mini-Course - https://bit.ly/RapidRelationshipRepair

Come join us in our free Facebook group Your Brain on Trauma, where is a whole community of women just like you who are on this sacred healing journey: https://www.facebook.com/groups/rm4fp/

I have been on a healing journey for quite a while now, and it is still ongoing. I have a unique way of approaching relational healing and it has come through a lot of trial and error.

Honestly? I’d say it’s been a lot more error than trial.

I love Psychiatry, but it did not teach me all the tools I needed for my healing journey.

I had to find those for myself.

It took me a long time to find the right tools and integrate them in the right way to create the life I have now and to maintain it over a decade, but now it is just who I am.

So how did I do it?

In this episode of Your Brain on Trauma, I’m sharing more about my journey, and how I came to be doing this work in this way.

I’m excited to be sharing some of the pretty and not-so-pretty behind-the-scenes with you, and you’ll hear the intergenerational trauma that has been passed down through my family, and how this trauma stops with me.

Find out more about my passion, mission, and how I want to help people on their own unique, imperfect, ongoing healing journeys.

In This Episode:

03:41 Healing in general involves many things. This is one of them…

04:29 Learn some background context to my journey through life and what I have needed to heal from

13:05 The beliefs instilled in you growing up can have a traumatic effect later on in life. Here’s how this manifested in my own life…

19:58 This is where things started to change for me in my life…

22:34 Find out why I continued to repress my feelings, emotions and who I really was, and the effect of this

27:56 Even after becoming a Psychiatrist, I didn’t know how to be in relationships.

31:24 Your story will be different from mine... we are all different.

32:06 These 3 areas are where the sum of your earlier experiences show up in your life.

34:15 I still get triggered, suspicious, and have a hard time trusting, but this is what’s different now…

35:14 Discover the quickest and most permanent path to healing, growth, and love.

Rapid Relationship Repair FREE Mini-Course - https://bit.ly/RapidRelationshipRepair

FREE tools:

Get FREE access to my ‘Conflict Cure’ mini-course, plus weekly relationship tools delivered straight to your inbox —> https://bit.ly/RelationalIQ-Newsletter

Need more customized support? Apply for a Relationship Breakthrough Call with Dr. Kavetha Sun —> https://go.oncehub.com/BreakthroughCallwithDrKavethaSun

In traditional therapy, you complain about something to your therapist. She/he supports and validates you and then you both brainstorm for a way to fix the issue. Right? Right. The problem is, another annoying thing happens next week, and then again next month....it's a never-ending cycle. I also use complaints in my work with clients. BUT....we use them to powerfully and FULLY heal, so you never have to suffer with that issue again. Listen in to find out how.

FREE tools:

Get FREE access to my ‘Conflict Cure’ mini-course, plus weekly relationship tools delivered straight to your inbox —> https://bit.ly/RelationalIQ-Newsletter

Need more customized support? Apply for a Relationship Breakthrough Call with Dr. Kavetha Sun —> https://go.oncehub.com/BreakthroughCallwithDrKavethaSun

Connect with Dr. Kavetha Sundaramoorthy:

- Facebook

- Facebook Group

- LinkedIn

- YouTube

- Special Offers: Mastery

Welcome to episode #1 of “Your Brain on Trauma” Podcast!

We begin by asking, How do you know if the past is still clouding your thinking?

After all, maybe you’ve done therapy or coaching about past issues. How do we know if it’s complete, or if there are more layers to uncover, and heal?

IMHO, there are 3 telltale signs. Tune in to see if you recognize any of them in your own life.

FREE tools:

Get FREE access to my ‘Conflict Cure’ mini-course, plus weekly relationship tools delivered straight to your inbox —> https://bit.ly/RelationalIQ-Newsletter

Need more customized support? Apply for a Relationship Breakthrough Call with Dr. Kavetha Sun —> https://go.oncehub.com/BreakthroughCallwithDrKavethaSun

Connect with Dr. Kavetha Sundaramoorthy:

- Facebook

- Facebook Group

- LinkedIn

- YouTube

Life is a series of transformations and becomings.

As you become more of who you are, you let go of the parts that are not in alignment with this newer, expanded version of you.

So what does that have to do with this week’s podcast?

Well, I have a big, juicy, beautiful announcement to make.

The podcast is undergoing an upgrade!

You heard that right. The podcast is going to experience a directional shift and will become something that is more authentically me.

With this change, there will be more power, conviction, and impact for you, and I’m going to accompany you through every transformational shift you make in your life.

So what will the new podcast entail? How will this help you?

Join me on this journey of a lifetime and learn why there is nothing more important than your legacy, and how my new podcast will embody this belief.  

Find out more about what you can expect from the new version of the podcast, and the many ways it’s going to help you.

In This Episode:

02:01 Find out why as you become more of who you are, you let go of the parts that are not in alignment with this newer version of you.

03:01 A sneak preview of the new podcast upgrade

04:20 I share the impetus for me to take on this healing journey

06:15 Do you ever wonder how your children learn how to do life?

07:43 Exciting news! Here’s what the podcast will soon be called…

09:16 When I say trauma, this is what I mean…

09:49 Discover what complex trauma is

13:32 Find out what contributes to isolation, shame, and a sense of hopelessness

18:21 THIS is what you will get on the other side of doing this work…

20:00 I hope you’re as excited as I am for the future of this podcast. Hear what we’re going to be talking about…

FREE tools:

Get FREE access to my ‘Conflict Cure’ mini-course, plus weekly relationship tools delivered straight to your inbox —> https://bit.ly/RelationalIQ-Newsletter

Need more customized support? Apply for a Relationship Breakthrough Call with Dr. Kavetha Sun —> https://go.oncehub.com/BreakthroughCallwithDrKavethaSun

Rapid Relationship Repair FREE Mini-Course - https://bit.ly/RapidRelationshipRepair