Porn, Betrayal, Sex and the Experts — PBSE

This episode is for women suffering from betrayal trauma AND their husbands who truly want to understand them. 

What are the symptoms of Betrayal Trauma? What are the feelings and words in your head and heart?

Betrayal Trauma has a massive impact on a woman’s sense of self-worth:

 ·       Personal inadequacy (physical, emotional and sexual)—“I’ll never be enough!”

·       Insecurity—in the marriage and other relationships

·       Spiritual damage—“Why would God let this happen?”

The “female” brain science of betrayal trauma—why it spills over into all aspects of a woman’s life.

How to let go of the “should haves” and “could haves” and move forward in your “authentic self.”

Learn to step into Divine connection and inspiration to know how to move forward when trust has been shattered.

What does your “authentic self” need physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually and sexually? How can you move forward with your #1 priority—your healing?     

Visit the PBSE website at: pbsepodcast.com 

Find out more about Steve Moore at:  Ascension Counseling
Learn more about Mark Kastleman at: Reclaim Counseling Services

Here's an article about healing Betrayal Trauma—https://www.reclaimcounselingservices.com/heal-betrayal-trauma-program-utah

Here's how you can know if a porn addict is "gaslighting" you—https://www.reclaimcounselingservices.com/is-a-porn-addict-gaslighting-you

When a spouse finds out about her husband's infidelity through porn use, an affair or other sexual behaviors, a flood of emotions can come rushing in—shock, confusion, anger, fear, inadequacy, anxiety, depression and many more. All of this is part of what is known as "Betrayal Trauma." 

In this episode, Mark and Steve talk raw and real about Betrayal Trauma—

• You are NOT going crazy! The roller coaster ride of emotions you're feeling is normal.
• Whatever you're feeling is OK for you. No one has the right to tell you how you should or shouldn't feel!
• Now that you know about his infidelity, should you still keep having sex with him?
• Should you stay in the relationship or move on?
• Can he ever really, truly break out of his porn/sexual addiction and be "normal"?
• Was anything in your past relationship with him real? Was it all a lie? Did he ever really love you?
• How can you ever trust him again? Where do you go from here???

Visit the PBSE website at: pbsepodcast.com 

Find out more about Steve Moore at:  Ascension Counseling  
Learn more about Mark Kastleman at: Reclaim Counseling Services

Here's an article about healing Betrayal Trauma—https://www.reclaimcounselingservices.com/healing-betrayal-trauma-video

Here's why a husband's porn addiction is NOT his wife's fault!—https://www.reclaimcounselingservices.com/his-porn-addiction-not-your-fault

A recent article in a popular publication claimed that "porn is the perfect stress reducer." In this episode, Mark and Steve get raw and personal about their experience.

In the "short-term" porn is a "drug," an escape and gives a perceived "sense of control" over one's life. Porn gives a temporary feeling of self worth, connection and satisfaction.

In the "long-term," after the escape of porn is over, the SAME challenges and stressors return--with a vengeance! Stress increases as feelings of guilt, shame and disconnection come flooding in. Porn lowers self-esteem. Porn makes one less resilient to real life and more conditioned to escape problems instead of facing and addressing them.

What to DO:  Engage in "mindfulness/feelings" journaling. Instead of immediately running to porn, explore--"What is going on in my life, in my headspace, in my environment and relationships that keeps PUSHING me to porn? What exactly is it that I'm trying to run from and escape?"

Visit the PBSE website at: pbsepodcast.com 

Find out more about Steve Moore at:  Ascension Counseling  
Learn more about Mark Kastleman at: Reclaim Counseling Services

Want to learn more about the Brain Science behind porn addiction?—https://www.reclaimcounselingservices.com/brain-science-porn-sex-addiction

Here's how porn addiction can be like a "drug addiction"—https://www.reclaimcounselingservices.com/is-pornography-a-drug-addiction

There's a big debate about what is pornographic and what is not. In this episode, Mark and Steve talk raw and real about how defining "porn"—it's less about what's being taken in, and more about the impact it's having on the viewer and others. 

• To the brain "meaning" is everything! It's all about your INTENTIONS.
• Parts vs. People
• Something to be consumed vs. someone to be valued
• Emotional isolation and disconnection

What to DO:  Use mindfulness journaling to assess your levels of fantasy and lust on a daily basis. What impact is this having on you being "fully present" with real life and real people? Are you more connected or more isolated as a result of your porn use?

Visit the PBSE website at: pbsepodcast.com 
Find out more about Steve Moore at:  Ascension Counseling  
Learn more about Mark Kastleman at: Reclaim Counseling Services

How do you know if you're addicted to porn? Check out this infographic—https://www.reclaimcounselingservices.com/are-you-addicted-to-porn

How can you overcome porn addiction? Here's an article that can help—https://www.reclaimcounselingservices.com/overcome-porn-sex-addiction