ShrinkChicks

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen talk about the hard conversations that come with every stage of a relationship and why they're never just a one-time discussion. From marriage and finances to kids, careers, family dynamics, and major life transitions, they explore how healthy relationships require ongoing communication as life continues changing.

They answer listener questions about bringing up a prenup, navigating seasons of sacrifice, deciding whether you're ready for kids, asking for help during uncertain life transitions, and telling a partner you want to leave a stable, high-paying job. Along the way, they discuss how fear shapes relationship decisions, why sacrifice only works when it's appreciated, and how to approach difficult conversations as teammates instead of opponents.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 7:30 to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton, and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

OneSkin: Get 15% off OneSkin with the code SHRINKCHICKS at https://www.oneskin.co/SHRINKCHICKS #oneskinp

Nine to Kind: Go to ninetokind.com and use code SHRINKCHICKS for 20% off your order

Zenni: Go to Zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order

Quince: Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen dive into what it really means to fight fairly in relationships and how conflict can actually bring couples closer when it’s handled well. They explore the difference between productive conflict and escalation, and why learning how you and your partner argue is just as important as learning how you love.

The conversation breaks down common conflict mistakes like bringing up the past, using blame or contempt, and not taking a pause when feeling activated. Em and Jen also discuss how to regulate your nervous system in real time, when to take a break during a fight, and how to repair after disagreement, especially in front of kids or when emotions are high. Listener questions cover how to stay grounded when you feel unheard, how to introduce healthier conflict tools to a partner who isn’t used to them, and what to do when insecurities get activated in the middle of an argument. The episode centers on one core question: in moments of conflict, do you want to be right, or do you want to be close?

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 5:30 to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

Book mentioned in today’s episode: How to Be an Adult in Relationships

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton, and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

OneSkin: Get 15% off OneSkin with the code SHRINKCHICKS at https://www.oneskin.co/SHRINKCHICKS #oneskinp

Nine to Kind: Go to ninetokind.com and use code SHRINKCHICKS for 20% off your order

Zenni: Go to Zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order

Quince: Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen unpack insecurities: where they come from, why everyone has them, and how they quietly shape our relationships, careers, and sense of self. They explore the connection between insecurity and hyper-independence, why asking for help can feel so uncomfortable, and how comparison culture can keep us stuck.

They also answer listener questions about needing reassurance in relationships, feeling hurt when someone's energy changes, worrying people won't like the "real" you, and what to do when you realize past choices were driven by insecurity instead of authenticity. Along the way, they discuss attachment, vulnerability, self-compassion, and how healing begins by challenging the stories we've carried for years.

The Still Face Experiment mentioned in today’s episode: https://www.gottman.com/blog/research-still-face-experiment/

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 6 minutes to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton, and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

OneSkin: Get 15% off OneSkin with the code SHRINKCHICKS at https://www.oneskin.co/SHRINKCHICKS #oneskinp

Nine to Kind: Go to ninetokind.com and use code SHRINKCHICKS for 20% off your order

Zenni: Go to Zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order

Quince: Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On this rewind episode of ShrinkChicks, Emmalee and Jen welcome Nedra Glover Tawwab back to the podcast! Nedra is a licensed therapist, a New York Times Bestselling author, and an expert on relationships and boundaries. If you haven’t followed her on Instagram yet, go do it now! They start the episode off by talking about Nedra's book, Consider This. Then, Nedra answers your questions about emotionally immature people and boundaries. She covers topics like navigating the emotionally immature parent/child relationship as an adult, how to know if you're the emotionally immature one, setting boundaries with people who say "it's not that deep," appeasing to avoid conflict, and so much more! Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action!

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Skims: Shop SKIMS Cotton and all of our favorite pieces, at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

OneSkin: Get 15% off OneSkin with the code SHRINKCHICKS at https://www.oneskin.co/SHRINKCHICKS #oneskinp

Nine to Kind: Go to ninetokind.com and use code SHRINKCHICKS for 20% off your order

Zenni: Go to Zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order

Quince: Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen talk about adult sibling relationships and why growing up in the same family doesn't always mean growing up with the same experience. They explore how family roles, parentification, favoritism, and changing family dynamics can shape sibling relationships long after childhood.

They answer listener questions about feeling responsible for younger siblings, navigating resentment toward a "golden child" sibling, and having difficult conversations without blame. They also discuss what happens when your emotional growth outpaces your family, how to avoid getting pulled into triangulation, and why siblings often experience the same parents in completely different ways.

The conversation also covers the eldest daughter dynamic, repairing relationships after years of distance, and how to let go of roles that may have helped you survive childhood but no longer serve you as an adult.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 10:30 to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

Link to Siblings Without Rivalry book mentioned

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!=

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Boll & Branch: Upgrade your sleep with Boll & Branch. Get 15% off your first order plus free shipping at BollAndBranch.com/shrinkchicks with code shrinkchicks

Skims: Shop Everyday Cotton, and all of our favorite bras and underwear at

http://www.skims.com/shrinkchicks. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

Shopify: Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at Shopify.com/shrinkchicks

Perelel: New customers can use code SHRINKCHICKS to get 20% off their first order at perelelhealth.com/shrinkchicks

Zenni: Go to Zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order

GreenChef: Head to Greenchef.com/50shrinkchicks and use code 50shrinkchicks to get 50% off your first month, then 20% off for two months with free shipping

Quince: Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping and 365-day returns on your next order

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen unpack the difference between compromise and settling in relationships, and why the line between them can feel so confusing sometimes. They explore how compromise is typically preference-based and healthy within a relationship, while settling often involves self-abandonment, avoidance, or giving up core parts of yourself.

The two answer listener questions about how to tell the difference in real time, what to do if you realize you’ve settled after the fact, and how social media highlight reels can distort our perception of our own relationships. They also dive into patterns of one-sided compromise, unconscious “relationship contracts,” and whether it’s possible to love someone deeply while still grieving what the relationship isn’t.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 8:30 to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Boll & Branch: Upgrade your sleep with Boll & Branch. Get 15% off your first order plus free shipping at BollAndBranch.com/shrinkchicks with code shrinkchicks

Skims: Shop Everyday Cotton, and all of our favorite bras and underwear at

http://www.skims.com/shrinkchicks. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

Shopify: Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at Shopify.com/shrinkchicks

Perelel: New customers can use code SHRINKCHICKS to get 20% off their first order at perelelhealth.com/shrinkchicks

Zenni: Go to Zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order

GreenChef: Head to Greenchef.com/50shrinkchicks and use code 50shrinkchicks to get 50% off your first month, then 20% off for two months with free shipping

Quince: Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping and 365-day returns on your next order

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen talk about how assumptions can quietly keep us stuck in relationships, work, and everyday life. From assuming people are upset with us to deciding how conversations will go before they happen, they unpack why our brains fill in the blanks and how those patterns often start as protection.

They answer listener questions about mind reading, assuming a partner doesn’t want connection, putting off hard conversations with friends, worrying your boss is disappointed in you, and feeling like asking for help makes you a burden. They also get into confirmation bias, cognitive distortions, and why the stories we tell ourselves can feel safer than finding out what’s actually true.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 5:45 to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Boll & Branch: Upgrade your sleep with Boll & Branch. Get 15% off your first order plus free shipping at BollAndBranch.com/shrinkchicks with code shrinkchicks

Skims: Shop Everyday Cotton, and all of our favorite bras and underwear at

http://www.skims.com/shrinkchicks. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

Shopify: Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at Shopify.com/shrinkchicks

Perelel: New customers can use code SHRINKCHICKS to get 20% off their first order at perelelhealth.com/shrinkchicks

Zenni: Go to Zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order

GreenChef: Head to Greenchef.com/50shrinkchicks and use code 50shrinkchicks to get 50% off your first month, then 20% off for two months with free shipping

Quince: Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping and 365-day returns on your next order

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen talk about expectations versus reality and why life’s biggest moments often don’t feel the way we imagined they would. From marriage and motherhood to careers, birthdays, friendships, and family relationships, they explore what happens when reality doesn’t match the version we pictured in our heads.

They answer listener questions about difficult in-law relationships, weddings bringing family dynamics to the surface, feeling disconnected from old versions of yourself, leaving an abusive relationship but not feeling immediate relief, and why even leaving something unhealthy can still bring sadness and grief. They also dive into pregnancy expectations, birthday pressure, and how letting go of the “right” way to experience life can create more room for what’s actually here.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 7 minutes to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Boll & Branch: Upgrade your sleep with Boll & Branch. Get 15% off your first order plus free shipping at BollAndBranch.com/shrinkchicks with code shrinkchicks

Skims: Shop Everyday Cotton, and all of our favorite bras and underwear at

http://www.skims.com/shrinkchicks. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

Shopify: Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at Shopify.com/shrinkchicks

Perelel: New customers can use code SHRINKCHICKS to get 20% off their first order at perelelhealth.com/shrinkchicks

Zenni: Go to Zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order

GreenChef: Head to Greenchef.com/50shrinkchicks and use code 50shrinkchicks to get 50% off your first month, then 20% off for two months with free shipping

Quince: Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping and 365-day returns on your next order

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on ShrinkChicks, Em and Jen talk about making friends as an adult and why something that used to happen naturally can suddenly feel so difficult. They unpack what actually creates friendship (hint: it’s less chemistry and more repeated proximity), why exclusion feels so dysregulating, and how friendships naturally evolve over time.

They answer listener questions about where to meet people, making friends without kids, maintaining self-esteem when you feel left out, navigating friendships that have drifted, and what to do when one friend starts carrying too much emotional weight. They also talk about introversion, political differences in friendship, and how to know when a friendship is changing versus when it’s truly run its course.

Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 4:30 to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

⁠Get Matched With One of Our Therapists⁠ at The Therapy Group!

⁠ShrinkChicks on Instagram⁠

Our ⁠Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal⁠!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! ⁠https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg⁠

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Boll & Branch: Upgrade your sleep with Boll & Branch. Get 15% off your first order plus free shipping at BollAndBranch.com/shrinkchicks with code shrinkchicks

Skims: Shop Everyday Cotton, and all of our favorite bras and underwear at

http://www.skims.com/shrinkchicks. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

Shopify: Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at Shopify.com/shrinkchicks

Perelel: New customers can use code SHRINKCHICKS to get 20% off their first order at perelelhealth.com/shrinkchicks

Zenni: Go to Zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order

GreenChef: Head to Greenchef.com/50shrinkchicks and use code 50shrinkchicks to get 50% off your first month, then 20% off for two months with free shipping

Quince: Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping and 365-day returns on your next order

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On today's rewind episode of ShrinkChicks, Emmalee and Jen discuss what it actually looks like to respond, not react. They discuss the practice of responding and not reacting, identifying and understanding your personal triggers, responding vs. reacting with others AND with yourself, why romantic relationships typically trigger us the most, and working toward not absorbing other people’s energy/mood. The episode ends with a Dear Em & Jen about being caught between a parent and a partner. Tune in to gain insight, awareness, and action! PS: Fast forward to around 7:15 to skip the intro and get straight to today’s content.

Get Matched With One of Our Therapists at The Therapy Group!

ShrinkChicks on Instagram

Our Know Yourself Grow Yourself Journal!!

Check out ShrinkChicks on YouTube by subscribing here! https://youtube.com/channel/UCrxuhDqoL4ML3UE8b2J2BBg

A special thank you to this week's sponsors for supporting ShrinkChicks! We have these exclusive offers for our listeners:

Boll & Branch: Upgrade your sleep with Boll & Branch. Get 15% off your first order plus free shipping at BollAndBranch.com/shrinkchicks with code shrinkchicks

Skims: Shop Everyday Cotton, and all of our favorite bras and underwear at

http://www.skims.com/shrinkchicks. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows

Shopify: Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial today at Shopify.com/shrinkchicks

Perelel: New customers can use code SHRINKCHICKS to get 20% off their first order at perelelhealth.com/shrinkchicks

Zenni: Go to Zenni.com/podcast and use code PODCAST15 for 15% off your first order

GreenChef: Head to Greenchef.com/50shrinkchicks and use code 50shrinkchicks to get 50% off your first month, then 20% off for two months with free shipping

Quince: Go to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠quince.com/shrinkchicks⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for free shipping and 365-day returns on your next order

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.