In this episode,  we explore the complex relationship between anxiety and shame stress. I highlight how shame stress often goes undetected and untreated in individuals dealing with narcissism. The manifestations of anxiety, including perfectionism, procrastination, and self-destructive thoughts are described and I emphasize how traditional approaches to anxiety only treat the symptom and not the underlying cause. I introduce the concept of "shame stress" and its role in driving anxiety.  I share a case study to illustrate how shame stress can manifest in social situations and  I demonstrate the tools and techniques that I use to foster lasting changes.  I conclude by  highlighting the need for us to further consider the relationship between the shame stress and one's "critical voice." 

To read more about the various facets of narcissism please click here

If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.

For more information about Dr. Mazzella’s psychoanalytic affiliations and membership in The International Psychoanalytic Association (IPA) -which is restricted to psychoanalysts who fulfill the most recognized international standards for psychoanalytic training- please click here

For a deeper dive into narcissism, I now offer courses approved for continuing education credits, available [here]. As a NYS Education Department-approved provider (#SW-0211), licensed social workers in New York can earn credits through these programs. Also, these courses are a wonderful opportunity for those who may simply want to further educate themselves on all issues related to narcissistic and personality disorder dynamics.

You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on:

https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

...

In this episode, we tackle common parental challenges like tantrums, defiance, and risky behavior. Traditional solutions often fall short, but by understanding the underlying causes—the impact of affective misattunement and rupture in the parent-child bond—we can foster healthier relationships. Rather than focusing solely on behavior, we explore tools and techniques to address the underlying emotional needs and re-establish a strong and loving connection.

Higher Listenings: Joy for Educators
A new podcast from Top Hat delivering ideas, relief, and joy to the future of teaching.

Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify

To read more about the various facets of narcissism please click here

If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.

For more information about Dr. Mazzella’s psychoanalytic affiliations and membership in The International Psychoanalytic Association (IPA) -which is restricted to psychoanalysts who fulfill the most recognized international standards for psychoanalytic training- please click here

For a deeper dive into narcissism, I now offer courses approved for continuing education credits, available [here]. As a NYS Education Department-approved provider (#SW-0211), licensed social workers in New York can earn credits through these programs. Also, these courses are a wonderful opportunity for those who may simply want to further educate themselves on all issues related to narcissistic and personality disorder dynamics.

You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on:

https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

...

In this episode I explore the concept of narcissistic deflation and its potential misdiagnosis as depression. I highlight the importance of detecting and properly treating narcissistic deflation, which often goes unnoticed without the expertise of a trained professional in personality disorders. Shame states are identified as a key factor in this phenomenon, with examples provided to illustrate their impact on individuals. The connection between excitement, disappointment, and shame is explored, emphasizing the role of misattunement in triggering shame. I discuss the importance of regulating shame and developing self-regulation skills to prevent narcissistic injury.  Finally, I offer a treatment approach focused on long-lasting change and “robust” self-regulation, and provide further resources and support for those struggling with these issues.

To read more about the various facets of narcissism please click here

If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.

For more information about Dr. Mazzella’s psychoanalytic affiliations and membership in The International Psychoanalytic Association (IPA) -which is restricted to psychoanalysts who fulfill the most recognized international standards for psychoanalytic training- please click here

For a deeper dive into narcissism, I now offer courses approved for continuing education credits, available [here]. As a NYS Education Department-approved provider (#SW-0211), licensed social workers in New York can earn credits through these programs. Also, these courses are a wonderful opportunity for those who may simply want to further educate themselves on all issues related to narcissistic and personality disorder dynamics.

You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on:

https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

...

Exploring Techniques and Overcoming Overwhelming Busyness! 

In this episode, Dr. Mazzella explores techniques for overcoming  'all or nothing' thinking and behaviors. He addresses a listener's question about healing fragmented selves. The conversation explores the concept of splitting and integration, the perils of perceiving the world in extremes, and the importance of accepting differences without assuming disconnection. The goal is to achieve integration and a more nuanced understanding of oneself and others. The episode concludes with an example of how Dr. Mazzella treats this kind of extreme, black or white, all or nothing thinking in his practice. 

To read more about the various facets of narcissism please click here

If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.

For more information about Dr. Mazzella’s psychoanalytic affiliations and membership in The International Psychoanalytic Association (IPA) -which is restricted to psychoanalysts who fulfill the most recognized international standards for psychoanalytic training- please click here

For a deeper dive into narcissism, I now offer courses approved for continuing education credits, available [here]. As a NYS Education Department-approved provider (#SW-0211), licensed social workers in New York can earn credits through these programs. Also, these courses are a wonderful opportunity for those who may simply want to further educate themselves on all issues related to narcissistic and personality disorder dynamics.

You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on:

https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

...

In this episode, Dr. Anthony Mazzella responds to listener questions, delving into topics such as coping with chaos in life and distinguishing between borderline and narcissistic traits. He explores a listener’s allure of chaos and its connection to an underlying desire for conflict and turmoil. The episode also covers Dr. Mazzella’s practical treatment strategies and a listener’s application of one of his tools when relating to a covert narcissist. The discussion concludes by addressing the distinctions between borderline and narcissistic personality disorders, emphasizing borderline traits such as powerful rage and swift, intense, and clingy involvements.

Higher Listenings: Joy for Educators
A new podcast from Top Hat delivering ideas, relief, and joy to the future of teaching.

Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify

To read more about the various facets of narcissism please click here

If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.

For more information about Dr. Mazzella’s psychoanalytic affiliations and membership in The International Psychoanalytic Association (IPA) -which is restricted to psychoanalysts who fulfill the most recognized international standards for psychoanalytic training- please click here

For a deeper dive into narcissism, I now offer courses approved for continuing education credits, available [here]. As a NYS Education Department-approved provider (#SW-0211), licensed social workers in New York can earn credits through these programs. Also, these courses are a wonderful opportunity for those who may simply want to further educate themselves on all issues related to narcissistic and personality disorder dynamics.

You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on:

https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

...

In this episode, Dr. Anthony Mazzella explores why narcissists need to create chaos. He describes the manifestations of this behavior and delves into the psychological reasons behind it. Dr. Mazzella explains how chaos-seeking narcissists play on situational vulnerability and bring up topics designed to evoke maximum emotional impact. He also discusses the gratification and satisfaction that narcissists derive from creating chaos. Dr. Mazzella provides intervention strategies, including containment, ego-supportive interventions, and exploring the need for this painful affective state.  

Takeaways

• Narcissists create chaos to satisfy their need for emotional turmoil and to recreate the turbulent environment of their early caregivers.
• Narcissists derive gratification and satisfaction from creating chaos and engaging in conflict.
• Intervention strategies for dealing with chaos-seeking narcissists include containment, ego-supportive interventions, and exploring the need for this affective state.

Higher Listenings: Joy for Educators
A new podcast from Top Hat delivering ideas, relief, and joy to the future of teaching.

Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify

To read more about the various facets of narcissism please click here

If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.

For more information about Dr. Mazzella’s psychoanalytic affiliations and membership in The International Psychoanalytic Association (IPA) -which is restricted to psychoanalysts who fulfill the most recognized international standards for psychoanalytic training- please click here

For a deeper dive into narcissism, I now offer courses approved for continuing education credits, available [here]. As a NYS Education Department-approved provider (#SW-0211), licensed social workers in New York can earn credits through these programs. Also, these courses are a wonderful opportunity for those who may simply want to further educate themselves on all issues related to narcissistic and personality disorder dynamics.

You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on:

https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

...

In this episode of the Narcissism Decoder, we explore the intricate world of narcissistic rage by addressing three pivotal questions surrounding healthy and unhealthy expressions of anger. Drawing insights from real-life examples, we delve into the nuances of anger, rage, and hatred, unraveling the complexities of emotional triggers and counter-control dynamics within relationships. The narrative offers profound insights into the patterns of narcissistic rage and provides a glimpse into making inroads with a narcissist. Join me on an interpretative journey as we connect split-off aspects in each partner, unraveling the cycle of rage within complex relationship dynamics

Higher Listenings: Joy for Educators
A new podcast from Top Hat delivering ideas, relief, and joy to the future of teaching.

Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify

To read more about the various facets of narcissism please click here

If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.

For more information about Dr. Mazzella’s psychoanalytic affiliations and membership in The International Psychoanalytic Association (IPA) -which is restricted to psychoanalysts who fulfill the most recognized international standards for psychoanalytic training- please click here

For a deeper dive into narcissism, I now offer courses approved for continuing education credits, available [here]. As a NYS Education Department-approved provider (#SW-0211), licensed social workers in New York can earn credits through these programs. Also, these courses are a wonderful opportunity for those who may simply want to further educate themselves on all issues related to narcissistic and personality disorder dynamics.

You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on:

https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

...

In this episode of the Narcissism Decoder podcast, the focus is on strategies to break the trauma bonding cycle. After highlighting the complexities of these relationships, I explore commonly suggested approaches found online, pointing out their limitations and why they may fall short in addressing the profound intoxication experienced within such bonds. Specifically, I critique strategies like journaling and creating boundaries, arguing that they overlook deeper feelings, such as the need for excitement and chaos to ward off inner emptiness. I illustrate these points through a case example, contrasting superficial online advice with the nuanced exploration I believe is essential for genuine change. Instead of merely praising surface-level efforts, I advocate for a more thorough examination of one's internal struggles and ambivalence, emphasizing the importance of mourning, detachment, and working through the desire for emotionally unavailable partners. Ultimately, my goal is to promote an understanding of trauma bonding and effective strategies supported by research and experience.

Higher Listenings: Joy for Educators
A new podcast from Top Hat delivering ideas, relief, and joy to the future of teaching.

Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify

To read more about the various facets of narcissism please click here

If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.

For more information about Dr. Mazzella’s psychoanalytic affiliations and membership in The International Psychoanalytic Association (IPA) -which is restricted to psychoanalysts who fulfill the most recognized international standards for psychoanalytic training- please click here

For a deeper dive into narcissism, I now offer courses approved for continuing education credits, available [here]. As a NYS Education Department-approved provider (#SW-0211), licensed social workers in New York can earn credits through these programs. Also, these courses are a wonderful opportunity for those who may simply want to further educate themselves on all issues related to narcissistic and personality disorder dynamics.

You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on:

https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

...

In this episode of The Narcissism Decoder, we explore trauma bonding—a profound psychological pattern where individuals form intense attachments to manipulative and abusive relationships, despite recognizing the harm. Through a psychoanalytic lens, we examine connections to unprocessed early losses and the creation of sadomasochistic dynamics. Trauma bonding is revealed as a defense mechanism against a lack of vitality in the early parent/child matrix, resulting in a profound inner deadness and an inability to acknowledge loss, leading to pathological mourning. This intricate exploration unveils how the trauma bond acts as a desperate attempt to patch over emotional voids, striving to resurrect a sense of connection and vitality within the confines of toxic relationships. Join me on this journey of understanding and growth as we navigate through these complexities, offering insights that can lead to a brighter, healthier path forward. 

Higher Listenings: Joy for Educators
A new podcast from Top Hat delivering ideas, relief, and joy to the future of teaching.

Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify

To read more about the various facets of narcissism please click here

If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.

For more information about Dr. Mazzella’s psychoanalytic affiliations and membership in The International Psychoanalytic Association (IPA) -which is restricted to psychoanalysts who fulfill the most recognized international standards for psychoanalytic training- please click here

For a deeper dive into narcissism, I now offer courses approved for continuing education credits, available [here]. As a NYS Education Department-approved provider (#SW-0211), licensed social workers in New York can earn credits through these programs. Also, these courses are a wonderful opportunity for those who may simply want to further educate themselves on all issues related to narcissistic and personality disorder dynamics.

You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on:

https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

...

In this episode, we explore the cyclical dynamics of a person grappling with self-hatred and projection. The individual exhibits a perpetual loop of feeling judged and persecuted. Drawing from psychoanalytic theory, I emphasize defense mechanisms, specifically projection and introjection, as key contributors to the individual's distorted perception of the external world. I highlight the struggle to break free from this cycle, emphasizing the need to increase awareness of one's inner psychic reality. The proposed treatment approach involves acknowledging destructive impulses, taking ownership of emotions, and fostering trust in actual people to shift from projecting internal judgments to introjecting healthier and loving whole objects. 

Higher Listenings: Joy for Educators
A new podcast from Top Hat delivering ideas, relief, and joy to the future of teaching.

Listen on: Apple Podcasts   Spotify

To read more about the various facets of narcissism please click here

If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.

For more information about Dr. Mazzella’s psychoanalytic affiliations and membership in The International Psychoanalytic Association (IPA) -which is restricted to psychoanalysts who fulfill the most recognized international standards for psychoanalytic training- please click here

For a deeper dive into narcissism, I now offer courses approved for continuing education credits, available [here]. As a NYS Education Department-approved provider (#SW-0211), licensed social workers in New York can earn credits through these programs. Also, these courses are a wonderful opportunity for those who may simply want to further educate themselves on all issues related to narcissistic and personality disorder dynamics.

You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on:

https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

...