The Narcissist in Your Life Podcast

There are exasperating choices women women have to make: stay married to a husband/partner who is psychologically fused with his narcissistic mother or make the decision or make the decision to end the marriage because you can no longer tolerate the severe narcissistic abuse projected on to you.

This woman is not going to change. She is the vaunted Matriarch of the family. She runs everyone:: her husband, children, sibligs and any one else tht crossees her path. Her son your partner/spouse) loves and hates his mother but he is psychologically locked in to her. He has never been able to separate himself from her clutches. 

Not long after the marriage his narcissistic mother revealed herself in full ubly vengefulness. She gossiped about you to all the relatives, made up secrets about you and your family, telling all who would listen that you came from people who were dishonest and low class, who may have comitted crimes. This vicious gossip and flat out lies was very convincing to her coteries of family followers. They believed her. 

You recognized that your spouse was in fact intimidated like a yung boy, even a baby, about hurting his mother's feelings who could turn the tears on and off like a well oiled tap. What an actress--She needed to take to the stage--a method actor. 

There are many life stories of women subjected to this level of narcissistic abuse that recognize that their spouses/partners are so fused with their mothers that this gordian knot cannot be untied. 

Many women have taken the pathways of freeing themselves from this triangular fusion. This is a difficult and complex process but you have won your personal freedom, and all of your options are open for your restoration, transformation and the full use of your many creative gifts. 

Click below for my book: Recovering and Healing After the Narcissist on Amazon:

https://tinyurl.com/2p92ymam

Click below for the Mental Health News Radio Network, a tremendous group of podcast show on every facet of mental health. I am honored to have my podcast show: The Narcissist in Your Life Podcast on this this network:

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Empaths have a tought time in this world. They are very different.  It is difficult/impossible for those who are not empaths to understand them. Introverterted----empaths are easily overwhelmed by their internal and external environments: loud noises, large public venues, bright liights, high and low temperatures, unfamiliar odors, heat, humidity, cold, strangers, crowded spaces like elevators, brash extroverts, parties, weddings, formal dinners, densely populated noisy public events. 

Empaths hide inside of themselves for protection and solace. They cry in private---tears run down their faces like tiny salty rivers. Empaths have very few individuals in whom they can confide.

Empaths intuit the family secrets. They remain mute on this subject, knowing that they will be dismissed as histrionic, overly0sensitive or psychologically disturbed.

Empaths are very gifted at "reading" individuals they meet, even strangers passing by. This is a great gift that they possess from their earliest days. They know if someone is greedy, secretive, craven, vile, enamored, scorned, fulminating, tawdry, crooked, scheming, cheating, unsavory, enlightened.

Don't expect others, even individuals you know uite well to understand your high sensitivities, clear perceptions, your need for solitude and rest. 

Self kindness activities for the empath include:

Move at your own pace; don't let anyone rush you. Many children are herded around and forced to move quickly by other family members. This is particularly stressful to empaths, whose nerves are frayed, stomach roiled when they are forced to hurry mindlessly. It is distressing and disorienting.

Develop daily routines that work well for you and that orient you into the parasympathetic nervous system and out of the fight or flight sympathetic mode. 

The practice of diaphragmatic breathing offers you an entree into the parasympathetic state. Diaphragmatic breathing activates the vagus nerve, one of the longest nerves in our system. The awakening of the vagus nerve puts you into the parasympathetic--the calming, healing, restorative part of the nervous system. 

Learn to appreciate your solitude, unedited writing, beautiful music, basic yoga poses like Happy Baby, movement and exercise that works for you. 

Click the link below to view my new print book: Recovering and Healing After the Narcissist on Amazon.

https://tinyurl.com/2p92ymam

Click the link below to access the Mental Health News Radio Network,  an excellent series of shows with podcasters on every facet of mental health. I am honored that my podcast is featured on this Network

www.mhnrnetwork.com

Hubris in man is ever-present. Wherever there is pride there is hubris. The word hubris comes from the ancient Greek meaning extreme pride and dangerous overconfidence. 

Hubris is outrageous and involves shaming their victims. 

The high level narcissist gains pleasure from his hubristic acts. Hor or she is not called out on these dark deeds if they hold sway and power. 

Those who are married to or partnered with or children of hubristic high level narcissists are vicims of their extreme psychopathology. 

You spend years and decades married to one of these individuals, go through a series of leaving them, returning and continuing the cycle, to the increasing stress, mood and anxiety disorders, chronic insomnia, re-traumatization from childhood.

There is a time of awakening for you, the decision to separate out from your narcissistic spouse. 

You deserve the return of your authentic self and freedom, your creative gifts and inner peace. 

Develop habits of self entitlement, self, care, self assertion, movement/exercise, Nature, nourishing food, good hydration, beautiful music, full use of all of your creative gifts. 

Click the link below for my print book: Recovering and Healing After the Narcissist on Amazon:

https://tinyurl.com/2p92ymam

Click the link below for the Mental Health New Radio Network, a network of great shows on every facet of mental health. I am honored that my show: The Narcissist in Your Life Podcast on on this network:

wC\ww.mhnrnetwork.com

Married to a high level aggressive narcissist you are under constant unrelenting stress that activates your sympathetic fight or flight nervous system. Oxidative stress affecs the sytems of the body/mind, causing extreme exhaustion, gut dysbiosis, chronic insomnia, unrelenting anxiety, chronic insomnia and bouts of depression. 

The high level narcissist in the beginning is an irresistible human being. Filled with incandescent charm, often very bright, bounding self confidence, often physically attracive with a compelling personal story, high ambitions and limitless optimism, you are quickly drawn. You become fascinated, even entranced. 

The clever high level kows how to read people. He/she knows your vulneratilities, deepest wishes and needs. He is aware of your temptations, passions, fears, wishes, secrets.

As the monthsn and years move forward you become very aware of the dark side of the ihigh level narcissist. You are on the receiving end of the narcissist's bombarding projections that are designed to strike fear and humiliation inside.

Some partnrs of high level narcissits experience a level of extreme exhaustion that is so painful that it interrupts daily activities. You have no energy rreserve; there is no comfrot or respite. Your gut aches much of the time. You dread the nights of insomnia. You drag yourself around, pretending to your partner or spouse that everything is just fine. 

There is a part of you  that knows tht this non relationship with the high level narcissist is inauthentic, a role imposed upon you to deliver the essential narcissistic supplies - control, adulation, praise, upon the high level. After all, you burnish his image. In some instances he or she looks even better since exploiting your creative gifts to his advantage.

There is a time of awakening whom you will not and cannot accept your role of servant to the egotistic demands and manipulations of this deluded and abusive individual. 

With your research, insights andintuitions you make the decision to separate from this disunion. Now you follow the pathways of the true authentic self.

Self care and restorationa re your guides rest and sleep, if you have trouble sleeping, be kind with yourself as you rest; norishing food, organic if possible, good hydration with pure water, movement and exercise that works for you---exercise reduces inflammation and reduces chronic stress, increases physical and psychological stmina, listen to beautiful music that activates the parasympathetic body/mind systems----calming the nervous system, giving you psychological and physical respite, spontaneous writing--letting out withoug editing the flow of feelings, images, past experiences whatever comes through in the writing at this moment on to the page, some formof meditation---this cn be Nature in its invariable forms of beauty---in Nature we ar experiencing an in the moment mindfulness.

Click below to view my new print book: Recovering and Healing After the Narcissist on Amazon

https://tinyurl.com/2p92ymam

Click below for the outstanding and comprehensive Mental Health News Radio Network. I am honored to have my show: The Narcissist in Your Life Podcast on this Network of podcasters

www.mhnrnetwork.com

You and the narcissist may share the same time and space in a family, business or marriage but you are planets apart. The narcissist thrives in a world of delusion of his/her making. The narcissist’s visions of reality are grandiose, skewed to an absolute belief in his superiority. He holds ultimate power and control over others through manipulations, deceits and chronic lying. We may not recognize that the individual we are meeting is a narcissist, especially if he/she is masterful at playing his roles. If you do not react the way he perceives you will, he is very adept at switching to another character in his drama. All of this is a convincing act but fraudulent.

Narcissists don’t change; their personality structure is rigid and very unlikely to change.. Narcissists generally don’t benefit from psychotherapy because they are certain that the problem(s) originates and is being driven by others—spouses, children, siblings, business associates. The narcissist believes he is flawless; the difficulty is with others not him. If you cross the narcissist, at times he/she will relentlessly pursue you, always seeking to Win! 

Narcissists always know that they will win. They persuasively lie to everyone, including judges, therapists and lawyers. Their confidence overflows with hubris. Without a conscience they throw threats, intimidations, defamations of character where ever they might stick. They often get away with their outrageous and destructive behaviors. Many narcissists present themselves as victims and convince many people through the fine art of lying. They have been practicing perfidy since they were children.

Learn about every aspect of the narcissistic personality disorder. It is well worth doing your homework. The earlier you identify a narcissist, the greater the edge you have in either avoiding this individual or giving yourself a head start on dealing with this person. Trust and deepen your intuition—that quality that tells us the truth directly and accurately. If you are dealing with a narcissist, learn to detach your feelings from their psychological bait. Practice some form of quieting your body/mind—yoga, restorative yoga, meditation, tai chi, etc. This will provide you with powerful techniques for grounding yourself.

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There is a theme that runs through responses that I receive from children of a narcissistic parent (s). The child is subjected to unbearable levels of ongoing abuse - scalding criticisms, withering humiliations in front of other family members, horrendous acts of psychological and literal abandonment. When the victim of a narcissist tells the truth about his dreadful pathological parernt,  he is not treated with kindness or understanding. The narcissistic mother or father gets a complete pass. 

I believe you and know how courageous you are. You are traveling along your pathway of healing, restoration, the evolution of the true authentic, creative self. 

Cllick the link below to my current print book on Amazon - Recovering and Healing After the Narcissist. 

https://tinyurl.com/2p92ymam

Click the link below for the Mental Health News Radio Network, a tremendous source of great podcasting on every facet of mental health. I am honored to have my podcast show on this network.

www.mhnrnetwork.com

The high level narcississt is a puppeteer who puts others at his/her mercy. He pulls the strings of personal power on his spoues, children and ex-spouses. The high level narcissist makes promises that he knows he will never keep to further manipulate and control those closest to him. No authentic relationship is possible with a narcissistic personality. It is all a duplicitous fabrication, a series of false, shiny images that are devoid of feelings, meaning, compassion or humanity. Highly aggressive narcissists rules by intimidation, inflecting shame and humiliation. Those who ermain tied to the cruelties of the narcissistic spouse often have family backgrounds of psychological trauma and deprivation. As a result these children don't feel entitled to think, feel, dream and create in freedom. They are always looking for appoval from the parental figure. In many cases they marry a partner who demands the same kind of intimidating obedience imposes on them as children.  For some there is a time of reckoning when the spouse of the narcissist can no longer be manipulated like a puppet and decides to finally sever ties. This is a fortuitous moment of truth for the abused spouse. The forces of the rise of the true self are at work, leading the individual to find his way to freedom and the fulfillment of the destiny of their original authentic self. 

As a spouse or partner or child of a high level narcissist, you have been psychologically abused. You didn't deserve to be treated with such disdain, 

With your insights and your research you now understand the true nature of the high level narcissist. 

Practice self care: sleep, rest, movement and exercise, experiences with Nature's beauty, fine music, meditation in the form that works for you like diaphragmatic breathing. Be kind to the small child inside of you.

Please click below to view my current book on Amazon.

https://tinyurl.com/2p92ymam

There are themes that run through the rivers of psyche and heart that children who suffer maternal deprivtion share. 

Dr. Leonard Sheingold,psychoanalyst and specialist in psychological trauma and abuse describes childhood deprivation in this way: "Child deprivatin means that the child has been exposed to too little to meet his or her needs.." he refines this definition: "To survive, this child must have enough gratification of the physical need for care and the psychological need to be wanted...so for the developing child, deprivation can lead to the same traumatic imbalances as overstimulation"

Adult children who were psychologicall deprived describe the experiences in different ways but the themes are similar. Mother was ashame of you because you were different from the other kids. That means you were "bad." 

Dr. John Bowlby introduced the concept of attachment of the child with the mothering figure. "He defined attachment as a "lasting psychological connectedness between human beings." The maternally deprived child doesn't have a secure attachment to the mothering figure. The child feels abandoned and unwanted, creating a negative sense of self. 

Click below to find my new print book of Recovering and Healing After the Narcissist on Amazon:

https://tinyurl.com/2p92ymam

Click below for the Mental Health News Radio Newtwork. I am honored to have a show: The Narcissist in Your Life, on this tremendous network of podcasts on every facet of Mental Health. 

www.mhnrnetwork.com

Covert narcissists are concealed beneath their many false self persononas.  Unlike the center stage overt narcissist they play their parts in the background, quiet, self effacing, even humble. In their social sphere the covert makes sure that he is regarded as a person of fine character with compassion, generosity, even spiritualiy. In essence they are extreme hypocrites. Acting these roles with such believeability, they are very difficult to detect. Most people are fooled by the covert narcissist. They know how to read you,what you want and need. Cunning and secretive, the covert narcissist is driven to exploit and deceive those whom he/she chooses as a partner or spouse. 

Behind closed doors you are the recipient of rage fests, humiliations and lies that cause you chronic stress with renewed hypervigilance, aggravation of insomnia, increasing of free floating anxiety, keeps you ungrounded, feeling guilty, activation of your shame and self blame.  

At some point, there is a time of eckoning when the abused spouse has had enough and can no longer tolerate another day with this cruel, deluded, person. 

Go to your research and the insights that come through from you intuitions. Stop blaming yourself; this is a leftover from growing up in a psychologicall abusive family. Focus on self soothing, daily self care, rest, sleep, nutrition, movement/exercise your way, exploring your unique creativity. 

Click below to my print book: Recovering and Healing After the Narcissist on Amazon to view it. 

https://tinyurl.com/2p92ymam

Click below for the Mental Health News Radio Network of podcasts and shows on every facet of Mental Health. I am honored to have a show on this great network: The Narcissist in Your Life Podcast.

www.mhnrnetwork.com

The high level narcissist is exploitive and deceptive. He/she knows exactly what he wants. He has written the plot and cast the characters for his narrative. The high level locates himself at stage center, lapping up the adulation, applause and veneration..The High level is the director who chooses people to play different roles that lead to his success. 

Quoting from my book Freeing Yourself From the Narcissist in Your Life gives you a front row seat of the High Level:"High-level narcissists are handsomely rewarded for the very attributes that make them inconsiderate and demanding human beings: self-absorption, agressiveness, hubris." When you appear before a high level narcissist you may be noticed or ignored. This depends on the possible "value" you have for them. I recall an experience with a high level narcissist. I was visisting a nearby friend one afternoon. We were in conversation discussing a variety of topics. There is a knock at the front door. A woman whom I had met a number of occasions enters. The visitor starts speaking non stop to my friend. There are no pauses in this monologue. After several minutes I say "hello" to this woman, knowing that I woild be recognized and greeted. A number of minutes by by. I finally speak up. There is no response. Her eyes and voice are riveted on my friend. The visitor is no more than seven feet away from me. No answer, no response, no recognition, no excuse, no exclamation! For this woman I don't exist. Inside, I was astounded and disbelieving that anyone could be so rude, obtuse, out of touch, disrespectful, boorish, self obsessed. She wouled not acknowledge my presence, literally. Manners and respect for individuals was foreign territory to this high level. The are without shame and flaunt their superiority. High level narcissists create their own realities. They are incapable of seeking and knowing the truth about themselves. Their "relationships" are based on exploiting and deceiving others to feed their inflated egos and self glorifications. 

Shameless, brazen, mendacious, predatory---the high level narcissist has neither limits nor boundaries. Master climbers, they seek the highest summits of power and control. They are incapable of genuine relationships.

Appreciate your authenticity, psychological grounding, individuality, unique creativity.

Click the link below to see my book Recovering and Healing After the Narcissist on Amazon:

https://tinyurl.com/2p92ymam

Click the link below for the Mental Health News Radio Network, 

www.mhnrnetwork.com

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