Absolutely Not

On this episode, Heather is panicked after the passing of Dolly Parton and Tim Curry and is worried about who will be next. She is buying deep freezers, life straws and searching for sustainable beef. She takes voicemails from people wondering what we can eat, being a type B person, and a newlywed with some questions. We get a final voicemail that brings Heather to realization that we all need to stop bitching.

Episode Sponsors:

Go to ButcherBox.com/absolutely to get $20 off your first box, plus your choice of free ribeye, new york strip, or filet mignon in every box for a year — with free shipping always.

Right now, Merit Beauty is offering our listeners their Signature Makeup Bag – which if you’ve seen it, it’s not just a make-up bag but really an accessory – free with your first order at meritbeauty.com.

Right now, podcast listeners can save up to 48% off their first order at pendulumlife.com/ABSOLUTELY.

Visit drinksilentflower.com/golf-widow and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout for 15% off your first order. 

Just visit ProlonLife.com/absolutely to claim your 15% discount and your bonus gift.

Visit WACOAL.com and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout for 10% off your first purchase. Offer valid for new customers only. Limit one code per customer.

Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.

Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On this episode from July 3rd, 2019 Heather sits down with Jeff’s biggest crush of all time, Jennifer Love Hewitt.  They discuss how she went from Kids Incorporated to a top Hollywood producer and all around bad bitch. They talk about love, grief, family and laugh through the pain of Hollywood.

Episode Sponsors:

Visit WACOAL.com and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout for 10% off your first purchase. Offer valid for new customers only. Limit one code per customer.

Goodwipes wants your booty to have a SCENTSATIONAL SUMMER! Buy any two packs of goodwipes at your favorite retailer, text them your receipt, and get reimbursed almost immediately for one of them. For more details, head to goodwipes.com/ABSOLUTELY.

Visit drinksilentflower.com/golf-widow and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout for 15% off your first order

Upgrade your everyday. Download the Quince app for app-exclusive offers, or go to Quince.com/absolutely. Get free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada and the UK, too.

Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.

Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On this episode, Heather is joined by one of her favorites, Logan Crosby. Logan will be joining us on the cruise again this year, but he also has his own new music that he is super excited about. While celebrating almost one year sober, Logan talks about how life has changed since the last time on the pod. They chat about the Clermont Lounge, senior pranks as well as the controversial Callaway golf ad.

Episode Sponsors:

Upgrade your everyday. Download the Quince app for app-exclusive offers, or go to Quince.com.absolutely. Get free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada and the UK, too. 

Ready for your own reset? For a limited time, Prolon is offering listeners 15% off sitewide plus a $40 bonus gift when you subscribe to their 5-Day Program! Just visit ProlonLife.com/absolutely to claim your 15% discount and your bonus gift.

Download the Bilt app and join the membership for where you live, at joinbilt.com/absolutely. 

Download Cash App Today: https://click.cash.app/ui6m/0ygert8g #CashAppPod. Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. Cash App Visa® Debit Flex Cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC, and The Bancorp Bank, N.A., pursuant to a license from Visa U.S.A. Inc. See terms and conditions for the Sutton prepaid card, Sutton debit flex card, and Bancorp debit flex card. Cash App Green features, Savings, Direct deposit, Round ups, Overdraft coverage and Discounts provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures.

Head to myGoldenChild.com/Absolutely and save up to 20% when you subscribe.

Find Primal Kitchen dressings, sauces, and condiments at your local grocery store or on Primalkitchen.com. Primal Kitchen - made for real food.

For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners $10 off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you visit Nutrafol.com and enter promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT.

Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.

Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On this episode, Heather celebrates the 400th episode of the podcast.  She is confused about how this is not the 4000th.  Christina (aka Tina) joins in with some games and memories from over the years of working together on Absolutely Not.

Episode Sponsors:

Head to https://www.squarespace.com/absolutely to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code absolutely.

Join Wayfair Rewards today to get 5% back on every purchase and start saving on your next home upgrade. 

Visit hillhousehome.com and use code ABSOLUTELYNOT at checkout for 20% off your first purchase of $150 or more.

The Korean skincare brand everyone is talking about. Our listeners get 20% off their entire order by using code ABSOLUTELY at jiyuskin.com/ABSOLUTELY #JIYU #ad

Visit DRINKAG1.com/ABSOLUTELY to grab the NEW AG1 Essentials Gummies today! 

To get your new wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month, go to MINTMOBILE.com/ABSOLUTELY.

Go to ButcherBox.com/absolutely to get $20 off your first box, plus your choice of free ground beef for life, or free chicken thighs or top sirloins in every box for a year —with free shipping always.

Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.

Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On this bonus episode, Heather welcomes Heather Shaw to the studio.  Shaw is most known for her uncanny Jim Carrey impression and being vegan and sober. These two outspoken broads chat about if that was really Jim on the carpet a few months ago, the illuminati and other conspiracies.  She is currently on the road and you can watch her special, Alright, See Ya!, on Youtube.

Episode Sponsors:

To get your new wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month, go to MINTMOBILE.com/ABSOLUTELY.

Visit OliveandJune.com/ABSOLUTELY20 for 20% off your first System!

Download the Bilt app and join the membership for where you live, at joinbilt.com/absolutely. 

Find Primal Kitchen dressings, sauces, and condiments at your local grocery store or on Primalkitchen.com. Primal Kitchen - made for real food.

Visit Carawayhome.com/NOT10 to take an additional 10% off your next purchase.

Visit WACOAL.com and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout for 10% off your first purchase. Offer valid for new customers only. Limit one code per customer.

Right now, podcast listeners can save up to 48% off their first order at pendulumlife.com/ABSOLUTELY.

Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.

Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On this episode, Heather has just come back from an Ole Miss visit and is flying high from Rush work week.  She is feeling nostalgic helping a friend’s kid move into the dorms, getting roped into Rush Tok, and figuring out that parents these days just love their kids more.

Episode Sponsors:

Upgrade your everyday. Download the Quince app for app-exclusive offers, or go to Quince.com/absolutely. Get free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada and the UK, too. 

Go to Ro.co/ABSOLUTELYNOT to see if you qualify.

Download Polymarket and use code ABSOLUTELY to get $20 to trade when you make a qualifying $10 deposit.. #polymarketpartner 

Use my link ThriveMarket.com/absolutely to get $30 off your first two orders PLUS an extra 25% off during the End of Summer Sale.

Visit resortpass.com/absolutely to get $20 off your first booking of $100 or more. 

Go to https://zbiotics.com/ABSOLUTELY and use ABSOLUTELY at checkout for 15% off any first time orders of ZBiotics probiotics.

Visit drinksilentflower.com/golf-widow and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout for 15% o your first order. 

Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.

Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On this episode, Heather is feeling the stress of “back to school”, and per usual she didn’t do her summer reading.  She gets her energy out with Robin at a Home Goods that would convince any non shoppers to try it out.  Voicemails from teachers, that first workout back, why everything has protein and what is up with asking for a coast lawyer.

Episode Sponsors:

Head to https://www.squarespace.com/absolutely to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code absolutely.

For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners $10 off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you visit Nutrafol.com and enter promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT.

Download the Bilt app and join the membership for where you live, at joinbilt.com/absolutely. Use our link so they know we sent you.

See the reviews, see what stands out, and see if BetterHelp is right for you. Visit Betterhelp.com/absolutely. 

Upgrade your everyday. Download the Quince app for app-exclusive offers, or go to Quince.com/absolutely. Get free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada and the UK, too. 

Visit drinksilentflower.com/golf-widow and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout for 15% off your first order. 

Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.

Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On this episode, Heather is hitting summer hard, but paying for it. We learn what the Doctor has diagnosed her with, the feelings seeing a Noah Kahan concert brought up and how life as a homeowner is starting out. We get iconic voicemails that are Absolutely Not going to disappoint.

Episode Sponsors:

 Visit hillhousehome.com and use code absolutely at checkout for 20% off your first purchase.

Give your skin the affordable, luxurious glow up it deserves. Go to Naturium.com/ABSOLUTELY for 10% off your first purchase today.

Join Wayfair Rewards today to get 5% back on every purchase and start saving on your next home upgrade.

Visit resortpass.com/absolutely to get $20 off your first booking of $100 or more.

Visit drinksilentflower.com/golf-widow and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout for 15% o your first order

Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.

Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On this episode, Heather is on a tear after some heated meetings as well as cancelled flights.  While she had to miss the World Cup due to her own flight being canceled, she is here to teach everyone about flight etiquette.  She chats about critics of The Odyssey, Lindsey Graham’s ladybugs, and how Jeff is turning off every light now that they are homeowners.  Heather takes on the voicemails and reminds everyone that we got this.

Episode Sponsors:

Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.

Check out https://www.squarespace.com/absolutely to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code absolutely.

For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners $10 off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you visit Nutrafol.com and enter promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT.

Visit ProlonLife.com/absolutely to claim your 15% discount and your bonus gift.

Head to myGoldenChild.com/Absolutely and save up to 20% when you subscribe.

Visit resortpass.com/absolutely to get $20 off your first booking of $100 or more. 

Visit drinksilentflower.com/golf-widow and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout for 15% o your first order. 

Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.

Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

On this replay episode from November 2, 2022 Heather is back from taping her first special, Son I Never Had, in Lexington, Kentucky.  She is full of gratitude as well as adrenaline after filming.  Son I Never Had is now available to stream on Hulu and to watch for free on Youtube!

Episode Sponsors:

Head to TryFirstleaf.com/absolutely to sign up and you'll get fifty percent off your first box PLUS free shipping for an entire year. 

Visit OliveandJune.com/ABSOLUTELY20 for 20% off your first System!

Head to ZBiotics.com/ABSOLUTELY and use the code ABSOLUTELY at checkout for 15% off.

Join Thrive Market with my link ThriveMarket.com/absolutely for $20 off your first three orders plus a FREE gift.

 Get 40% off select Lola Blankets products at Lolablankets.com by using code ABSOLUTELY at checkout. Experience the world’s #1 blanket with Lola Blankets.

Make your summer wardrobe feel easier. Go to Quince.com/absolutely for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada, too.

To get your new wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month, go to MINTMOBILE.com/ABSOLUTELY. 

Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.

Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.