MEN’S REALLY NEED TO FALL OUT OF LOVE WITH THEIR OWN CONFUSION & SCATTERED-NESS

God knows the women of our modern world have their share of work to do when it comes to healing their relationship with the masculine and coming into alignment and agreement with men if they are to build any kind of a worthwhile partnership with men.

The women who show up to my classes tend to be women who have already done their work and are ready to receive a man’s strength and leadership and containment.  But for these women, there never seem to be enough men to go around who can meet them and match them.

I see too many men today who are so watery and un-contained themselves that it is downright depressing.  What’s worse, the men seem to have made a virtue out of their wateriness and their lack of strength and leadership.  These are the energies that so many men are walking around in today:

1.  CONFUSION.  AMBIVALENCE.  ENDLESS ‘SELF-REFLECTION’ — WHICH IS MORE AKIN TO SELF-ABSORPTION.

2.  SCATTERED ATTENTION.  UN-CONTAINED.  PRE-OCCUPIED WITH THEIR OWN EMOTIONS AND THEIR OWN EMOTIONALITY.

3.  WOUNDED.  REPRESSED.  CARRYING A BACKLOG OF UNPROCESSED EMOTIONS.  NOT ABLE TO EXPRESS THEMSELVES FLUIDLY, NOT BEING ABLE TO CREATE A PERMISSION FIELD FOR A WOMAN FOR HER EXPRESSION.

4.   NEEDY.  SEEKING UNDERSTANDING.  WANTING APPROVAL.

None of these energies will ever earn you any points with the feminine.  They don't want these burdens of yours in their lap.  They don’t want to sort out your confusion and ambivalence.  

Your scattered attention gives women no containment.  They are not interested in healing your wounds and unblocking your blocks.  And your neediness and approval-seeking is repulsive to women.

None of these stances on the women’s part are unfair!  If you feel this is unfair, you need to work doubly hard at your whininess.  

A man bringing these whining and weak energies to his woman has never been a healthy part of the man-woman contract.  Never has been.  Isn’t today.  Never will be.

Men — do you work.  Come into your clarity and leadership.

You are not much use to women until you do.

— Om Rupani

https://omrupani.org/creating-the-dominant-man

www.OmRupani.org

THE CRUCIAL BUILDING BLOCK OF COMMITMENT IS ATTENTION, NOT TIME

The word and idea of COMMITMENT for most people implies ‘long time span’.

This is technically incorrect.  Although a commitment can span for a long period of time, time is not the crucial building block of commitment; attention is.

It’s possible to offer your commitment to a person for only 5 minutes.  And it’s possible to be in a long marriage in which the two people have not been committed to each other for years.

I put three ingredients in the building of commitment:

1.  ATTENTION
2.  MASTERY
3.  INVESTMENT IN OPTIMAL OUTCOME

— Om Rupani

OmRupani.org

www.OmRupani.org

PRIESTESS OF EROS CLASS Q&A.

Here with my amazing co-facilitator Lauren Harkness, talking about our upcoming 6-month intensive training for women.

More course info is at : https://omrupani.org/practitioner-mastery

— Om Rupani

www.OmRupani.org

WE ARE DROWNING IN EMOTION AND STARVING FOR LOVE

Ask most people, and they will say that Love and Emotions are pretty much the same thing.

Most people will agree that Loving someone means caring about their Feelings.

Many people will agree that how we Love someone is to soothe and comfort their Feelings.

I believe this is a very infantile model of Love.

Events of heart activation in the 4th center certainly generate experiences of strong emotion in us, but far and wide, our emotions have nothing to do with Love at all.

If anything, while we are stuck in the infantile management of each other’s emotions, Love actually has very little room to flourish.

Even when heart activations happen, if the person is so uncomfortable with holding energies in their emotional system, they will do everything in their power to quash the Love energies in order to get back to a level of comfort.

— Om Rupani

OmRupani.org

www.OmRupani.org

LEAH PIPER & DR. WILLOW BROWN PODCAST - 2023

Lively conversation with Leah Piper & Dr. Willow Brown on all matters related to Man-Woman relating, BDSM and Dominance & Submission.

— Om Rupani

OmRupani.org

www.OmRupani.org

IF YOU WANT TO LEAD YOUR WOMAN, BE BETTER THAN YOUR WOMAN

If you want to lead anybody, be better than them.

This is the core demand of leadership.  We want to be led by our betters.  We don’t want to be led by people we look down upon.

This applies to any and all hierarchically relationships.  Teachers need to be better than their students.  Parents need to be better than their children.  Leaders need to be better than their followers.

If you as a man want to lead your woman in your relationship, be better than your woman.

There is no happy relationship in which the woman looks down on her man.

There is no happy relationship is which the woman thinks, ‘I’m better than this man.’  There are no exceptions to this fundamental principle of leadership and hierarchy.

The fact that women are only attracted to men who are better than them in itself is an indicator that women are in fact looking to be in an hierarchical dynamic with men.  Their core attraction principle towards men is a principle of leadership and hierarchy.

Men, on their part, need to stop making excuses for not delivering, not measuring up, for remaining infantile, wounded, slack and then still expecting their women to submit to them.  This can never happen.  It is illogical.  It is against the very programing in women’s DNAs.  In is against the programing in all of our DNAs.  

WE DON’T FOLLOW PEOPLE WHO ARE NOT OUR BETTERS.

No amount of polarity theory and learning is going to make up for the lack in your superiority to your woman.  The core way you dominate a woman is by being better than her and her thinking and feeling day after day that you are in fact better than her.

If a woman is happily surrendering and submitting to you, you can bet your bank account that she in fact does think and feel that you are better than her.

If you want to inspire a woman to surrender and submit to you, make yourself better than her.

As soon as your woman starts feeling that she is better than you, your relationships is heading down the toilet.  Do something about that immediately.

If you as a woman feel you are better than any given man, don’t even bother trying to create anything with that man.  It’s pointless.

If in an ongoing relationship, you as a woman start to feel that you are better and superior to the man you are with, recognize that as the death knell of this particular relationship.

— Om Rupani

OmRupani.org

www.OmRupani.org

ASPECTING ARCHETYPES IN THE PRIESTESS CLASS

Lauren Harkness and I discuss the First Module of the Modern Priestess of Eros.  Aspecting our Dom/sub archetypes for greater personal expression and to increase our ability to hold space for others.  

This was a powerful and potent exploration for the graduates of the last round of Modern Priestess.  

If you're interested in the class, the next round begins September 17th.  

We have a Q and A next Thursday the 27th.  

You can find info/register for both below.  Hope to see you there!

To Register for our Q and A on July 27th at 7pm EST: https://laurenharkness.kartra.com/calendar/AZDuXEsQ20Za

To Register/Information for Modern Priestess of Eros:

https://omrupani.org/practitioner-mastery

www.OmRupani.org

ONE GUARANTEED WAY TO LIVE A MEDIOCRE LIFE

One guaranteed way to live a mediocre life is to live in fear and dread of one’s own negative emotional responses.

To live to avoid negative feelings.

To live in fear that an event, an action, a direction one may take might generate negative emotions in us.

To live in fear of fear.

To live in fear of humiliation.

To live, not in the fear of failure necessary, but how failure will FEEL, how BAD it will feel.

To live, not in fear of Rejection, but how the rejection will FEEL.

To live, not in fear that your love will not be returned or that the relationship will fall apart, but how that would make you FEEL.

————-

Go ahead and live in fear of your own negative emotions, make decisions and design your life with an eye towards avoiding negative emotions, and you are guaranteed to create a mediocre life.

All the sins and negative consequences of PRIDE fall in this category.  We are afraid of LOOKING bad.  We are afraid of being HUMILIATED.  We are afraid of what others will think of us and how that would make us FEEL.

All decisions based on our EGO and our attempt to LOOK GOOD are based in this.

We end up living an unreal and simulated life in this modality.  We become victims to our own emotional body.

We can make things even worse from this threshold and take forward this disastrous step towards victimhood - we can start holding OTHERS responsible for generating negative emotions in us.  Now, not is it our own full time job to dodge negative emotions in our own systems, we now want other people to also start walking on egg shells around us to make sure they don’t trigger any negative feelings in us.

This is an absurd, infantile and narcissistic state.  This in fact is how people with Narcissistic Personality Disorder operate.  Anything and everything can ding a narcissist’s fragile esteem and make them FEEL BAD.  Instead of dealing with their own negative emotions, they allow themselves to be swept away in the events in their emotional body and respond in a nasty and vindictive way towards others and hold them responsible for the events in their emotional body.

Increasingly, I see this narcissistic mechanism in more and more people who in fact are not suffering from all-out NPD.  This emotionalism is ‘in vogue’ these days in how we see ourselves and how we feel we ought to be and how others ought to be towards us.

We are being encouraged to IDENTIFY with our emotional response.  We are being encouraged to operate by the premise that MY EMOTIONS ARE ME!

I have a solution to this : FUCK YOUR EMOTIONS!  FUCK YOUR FEELINGS.  AND MINE TOO!

Our feelings are our problems.  Our feelings are most of the time NOTHING at all.  It is up to us to make sure that our emotions are in fact NOTHING AT ALL!

Stop being reactive to your own emotions, and stop asking others to manage your emotions.  

THAT IS NOT WHAT LOVE IS!

We have come to just accept this as a truism : IF YOU LOVE ME, YOU WILL CARE ABOUT MY FEELINGS!  

NO!!!!!!  Fuck no!

How about, I can love you plenty and still feel that your feelings are your own fucking problem.  Try this on for size.

Manage your own emotions.  Stop asking others to care so much about your emotions.  Stop living your life and basing your decisions on what emotions those actions and decision may generate in your emotional body.  And once you have done your own work, get rid of all people form you life who want you to manage THEIR emotions.

www.OmRupani.org

S** & CALALMITY PODCAST

Lively conversation with podcasters based in Austria.

Upcoming Course In Austria : https://omrupani.org/tantra-meets-bdsm-austria

-- Om Rupani

www.OmRupani.org

WOMEN SHARING ABOUT PARTICIPATING IN THE MEN’S COURSE

I had a group of wonderful women practitioners come and give feedback to the men on how they are landing on women’s system.

The women are sharing here at the end of the course about their experience with engaging with the men and giving them feedback, and what message they have for men of today.

— Om Rupani

OmRupani.org

www.OmRupani.org