Relationships Uncensored: Real Talk with Lisa Sonni

By Lisa SonniSociety & Culture Health & Fitness Mental Health Education Self-Improvement Relationships

Relationships Uncensored: Real Talk with Lisa Sonni episodes

May 12Why Narcissists Explode When You Set Boundaries | Bill Eddy on High Conflict Escalation | S4E1
Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!
You knew it was coming. Maybe not the exact moment, but you felt it building.
The tension in the room. The stillness before it broke. Your nervous system clocked it before your brain caught up.
That's pattern recognition, and there's a reason these conflicts follow a script.
Lisa sits down with Bill Eddy, lawyer, therapist, mediator, and co-founder of the High Conflict Institute, to break down exactly why escalation in high conflict relationships is predictable, what triggers it, and how it plays out differently across three distinct personality patterns.
Bill explains why setting a boundary isn't just uncomfortable for these people, it's experienced as a threat that requires a response. He covers how they move from verbal attacks to punishment to recruiting others into the conflict, why they see themselves as the victim even while causing harm, and what survivors consistently get wrong when they're in the middle of it.
One of the most important moments in this conversation is a simple reframe: escalation is not proof that you did something wrong. It's proof that the system was challenged. Once you understand that, everything shifts.
Resources mentioned:
SLIC Solutions: Setting Limits and Imposing Consequences by Bill Eddy
Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder by Bill Eddy
High Conflict Institute: highconflictinstitute.com
Join Lisa Sonni & Dr. Peter Salerno in Boston, MA November 13-15, 2026 here: https://lisasonni.com/unbreakable-and-irreplaceable/
Support the show
This is the podcast they don't want you listening to.
👉 Find me at lisasonni.com
Book A Session with Lisa
Join my online survivor community called She Rises Collective where we are breaking free, rebuilding and dismantling patriarchy.
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New episodes drop every Tuesday.
Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth - and remember:
You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.
47 min
May 05 “It’s Not Confusion” Why Abusive Behavior Feels Unclear (But Isn’t) | S3EP16
Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!
You keep trying to make sense of it.
Maybe he didn’t mean it. Maybe you misunderstood. Maybe you’re overthinking.
The reality? Confusion is not the problem. It’s the outcome. When someone can hurt you and comfort you in the same breath, your brain tries to reconcile two realities that don’t belong together. He loves you and he harms you. He apologizes and repeats it. That contradiction is what keeps you stuck trying to figure it out.
In this “Best Of” Real Talk episode, Lisa pulls together powerful insights from Dr. Peter Salerno, Aishia Grevenberg, Dr. Les Carter, and Brent MacLerie to expose what is actually happening beneath that confusion.
They break down how manipulation often hides behind subtle behavior, how entitlement drives repeated harm, and why the idea that “he doesn’t know what he’s doing” keeps you trapped longer.
When behavior repeats, especially when it hurts you, that is not confusion. That is information.
The clarity you’ve been searching for is not in understanding him better. It’s in seeing the pattern clearly and trusting what it’s already showing you.
🎧 Listen to the full episodes:
Dr. Peter Salerno: https://youtu.be/_gKCmT1YazY
Aishia Grevenberg: https://youtu.be/-LeQ9ZwtcGY
Dr. Les Carter: https://youtu.be/kU5siEWppf8
Brent MacLerie: https://youtu.be/aibF4SAjX_8
Join Lisa Sonni & Dr. Peter Salerno in Boston, MA November 13-15, 2026 here: https://lisasonni.com/unbreakable-and-irreplaceable/
Support the show
This is the podcast they don't want you listening to.
👉 Find me at lisasonni.com
Book A Session with Lisa
Join my online survivor community called She Rises Collective where we are breaking free, rebuilding and dismantling patriarchy.
Follow on IG
Watch on YouTube
Get My Books Here
New episodes drop every Tuesday.
Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth - and remember:
You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.
48 min
April 28 If He Acts Like This About Sex, It's Abuse | Best Of Relationships Uncensored | S3E16
Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!
"Physical touch is his love language." "If you loved him, you'd just do it." "If you were having more sex with him, maybe he wouldn't cheat."
You've heard these. Maybe you've even believed them. These aren't relationship truths. They're the exact language used to override your instincts and make you question what you already know.
In this Best Of episode, Lisa brings together the most powerful moments from her conversations with Dr. Danielle Kramer, Dr. Kate Balestrieri, and Nat LaJune, four voices, four perspectives, all pointing to the same truth: sexual entitlement inside a committed relationship is coercion.
Coercion is abuse. If your bedroom feels like an obligation instead of a connection, that's not a you problem. When someone believes your body is something they're owed, intimacy doesn't just suffer, it dies. And it's being killed on purpose.
Your feelings matter. Your discomfort matters. Your no matters.
Links to the full episodes with Dr. Danielle Kramer, Dr. Kate Balestrieri, and Nat LaJune are below.
Join Lisa Sonni & Dr. Peter Salerno in Boston, MA November 13-15, 2026 here: https://lisasonni.com/unbreakable-and-irreplaceable/
Support the show
This is the podcast they don't want you listening to.
👉 Find me at lisasonni.com
Book A Session with Lisa
Join my online survivor community called She Rises Collective where we are breaking free, rebuilding and dismantling patriarchy.
Follow on IG
Watch on YouTube
Get My Books Here
New episodes drop every Tuesday.
Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth - and remember:
You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.
43 min
April 14 How Abusive Men Turn Strong Women Into Women Who Stay with Dr. Peter Salerno | S3EP15
Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!
You didn’t become someone else overnight. You were shaped into someone who could survive him.

It starts quietly. The confidence he once admired becomes “too much.” Your opinions become “dramatic.” Slowly, almost imperceptibly, you begin editing yourself to keep the peace. What feels like compromise is actually erosion.

In this conversation, Lisa sits down with Dr. Peter Salerno to expose the psychological process behind how strong, self-aware women lose themselves in abusive relationships. It is patterned, strategic, and deeply disorienting. They unpack how abusers study your strengths, then weaponize them, how intermittent reinforcement conditions you to stay, and how the relationship becomes a system that rewards your self-abandonment while punishing your authenticity.

They also break down the moment everything flips, when you stop assessing him and start managing yourself. The confusion, the self-doubt, the constant internal analysis. None of it is weakness. It is conditioning.

By the time you leave, the deepest loss is not just the relationship. It is the version of you that slowly disappeared inside it.

Healing is not just about understanding what happened. It is about rebuilding self-respect so fully that you can never be trained out of yourself again.
Join Lisa Sonni & Dr. Peter Salerno in Boston, MA November 13-15, 2026 here: https://lisasonni.com/unbreakable-and-irreplaceable/
Support the show
This is the podcast they don't want you listening to.
👉 Find me at lisasonni.com
Book A Session with Lisa
Join my online survivor community called She Rises Collective where we are breaking free, rebuilding and dismantling patriarchy.
Follow on IG
Watch on YouTube
Get My Books Here
New episodes drop every Tuesday.
Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth - and remember:
You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.
46 min
April 07 “These Are Not Facts”: The Lies That Keep Abuse Normalized | S3E14
Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!
You were never “too sensitive.” You were surrounded by lies repeated so often they started to feel like truth.

Abuse is rare.
Women lie.
Men and women do it equally.

None of these are facts, and believing them keeps you stuck questioning your own reality.

In this conversation, Lisa sits down with Brent McLearie, creator of the “These Are Not Facts” series, to dismantle the narratives that quietly protect abuse while discrediting survivors. They break down how these myths spread, why they are so convincing, and how they distort the way we interpret harm, credibility, and responsibility.

When abuse is framed as rare, survivors struggle to name it. When false accusations are exaggerated, survivors stay silent. When everything is flattened into “equal,” the truth disappears.

Brent brings data and context to what survivors already feel in their bodies, that something is off about the way the world talks about abuse. Together, they expose how these narratives shift focus away from perpetrators and onto survivors, forcing them to defend their pain instead of being supported through it.
Join Lisa Sonni & Dr. Peter Salerno in Boston, MA November 13-15, 2026 here: https://lisasonni.com/unbreakable-and-irreplaceable/
Support the show
This is the podcast they don't want you listening to.
👉 Find me at lisasonni.com
Book A Session with Lisa
Join my online survivor community called She Rises Collective where we are breaking free, rebuilding and dismantling patriarchy.
Follow on IG
Watch on YouTube
Get My Books Here
New episodes drop every Tuesday.
Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth - and remember:
You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.
42 min
April 01 When Sex Becomes Obligation: Sexual Entitlement in Relationships | S3E13
Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!
Sexual entitlement isn’t “a relationship issue.” It’s a belief system. It’s the mindset that your body comes with the marriage, the title, the ring, the label, the contract, the “needs.” It’s the idea that your availability lives on standby, no matter how he treats you, no matter what your body feels, no matter what your nervous system is screaming.

This is a rare solo episode, but you’re not listening to me alone. I’m reading three anonymous stories from women who volunteered to share what’s happening inside coercive, entitled relationships, where “no” turns into punishment, pressure, guilt, and emotional warfare. Names and identifying details have been removed, and the audio will be edited for clarity.

This isn’t about different libidos. It’s not about two people feeling disconnected sometimes. It’s not “schedule it in” advice. This is about men who act like sex is owed, men who track it, count it, demand it, punish you for it, and then flip it on you when you don’t comply. It’s about how consent gets turned into a debate, how your character ends up on trial, and how women end up using their bodies to manage a man’s mood, not because they want to, but because they feel like they have to.

If you feel tense instead of turned on when he initiates, that makes sense. If you feel numb, braced, guilty, or like you’re calculating consequences in your head, that makes sense. If you’ve ever found yourself initiating just to avoid the coldness, the slamming, the rage, the sulking, the withdrawal, or the escalation, listen closely. That’s not intimacy. That’s survival.

And when he calls it “withholding,” “rejection,” “weaponizing sex,” or even “emotional abuse,” pay attention to what’s happening. A lot of abusive men use therapy language and “healthy relationship” talk to make you doubt your reality and to force a false equivalency, so you end up defending yourself instead of seeing the pattern.
Join Lisa Sonni & Dr. Peter Salerno in Boston, MA November 13-15, 2026 here: https://lisasonni.com/unbreakable-and-irreplaceable/
Support the show
This is the podcast they don't want you listening to.
👉 Find me at lisasonni.com
Book A Session with Lisa
Join my online survivor community called She Rises Collective where we are breaking free, rebuilding and dismantling patriarchy.
Follow on IG
Watch on YouTube
Get My Books Here
New episodes drop every Tuesday.
Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth - and remember:
You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.
45 min
March 24 Divorcing a Narcissistic or Toxic Partner: What You Need to Know | S3EP12
Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!
In this episode of Real Talk with Lisa Sonni: Relationships Uncensored, Lisa speaks with Angela Van, CEO of Family Court Corner, about the realities of divorcing and co-parenting with an abusive or highly destructive partner. Angela shares lessons from her own ten-year custody battle—one that reached the Supreme Court of Canada—and explains how she now helps survivors navigate divorce, custody disputes, and post-separation abuse.

The discussion focuses heavily on strategy. Angela explains how abusive partners often create constant distractions and conflicts to keep survivors emotionally engaged and reactive. This pattern can drain energy, escalate conflict, and damage credibility during divorce or custody battles. Learning to disengage, manage emotional responses, and shift focus back to personal growth and stability can be a powerful way to regain control during this process.

The episode also examines how emotional dysregulation, ego, and understandable anger can unintentionally work against survivors in family court. Judges, lawyers, and professionals observing the situation often see only behavior in the moment, not the long history of abuse behind it. Because of this, maintaining composure, documenting behavior, and refusing to be pulled into conflict can become critical parts of protecting both oneself and one’s children.

Throughout the conversation, Angela shares practical insights on navigating high-conflict divorce, handling custody disputes with abusive partners, and maintaining emotional boundaries during co-parenting with someone who continues to provoke conflict. The goal is not only survival during the legal process, but ultimately growth and empowerment beyond it.

Topics discussed in this episode include post-separation abuse, family court strategy, divorcing an abusive partner, custody battles with toxic ex-partners, emotional regulation during divorce proceedings, co-parenting with a high-conflict parent, and reclaiming personal power after leaving an abusive relationship.

If you are interested in relationship psychology, toxic relationship recovery, custody battles, or strategies for navigating divorce with an abusive partner, this episode offers insight from someone who has lived through the process and now helps others do the same.
Join Lisa Sonni & Dr. Peter Salerno in Boston, MA November 13-15, 2026 here: https://lisasonni.com/unbreakable-and-irreplaceable/
Support the show
This is the podcast they don't want you listening to.
👉 Find me at lisasonni.com
Book A Session with Lisa
Join my online survivor community called She Rises Collective where we are breaking free, rebuilding and dismantling patriarchy.
Follow on IG
Watch on YouTube
Get My Books Here
New episodes drop every Tuesday.
Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth - and remember:
You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.
50 min
March 17 Toxic vs Abusive Relationships: The Difference Most People Miss with Dr. Marina Rosenthal | S3EP11
Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!
Couples therapy is not the place to sort out coercive control. Full stop. But I also get why women end up there anyway, because when your relationship is messy, you’re trying to name what’s happening. Is it stress. Is it trauma. Is it aggression. Is it abuse. And when you’re living inside it, it can all blur.

I sat down with Dr. Marina Rosenthal, psychologist, couples therapist, and sex therapist with a background in trauma psychology and violence against women research, to talk about that murky middle. The high conflict stuff that feels awful, the dynamics that get minimized as “just communication,” and the moments that get used to confuse you even more.

We break down why language matters, why “abuse” gets debated while behaviors get ignored, and why asking “is it abuse?” often isn’t the most useful starting point. We talk coercive control, sexual coercion, threats, weaponized calm, the praise that keeps you in line, and the way power shows up through money, freedom, access, and the invisible consequences you learn to avoid.

We also go into Darvo, false equivalency, the trap of “you’re both toxic,” and what actually helps you assess safety without getting stuck in labels. Real talk, lots of nuance, but still clear. You’re not crazy for being confused. Confusion is part of the system.

Dr. Marina also shares where to find her free resource “Red Flags and Red Lines” to help you figure out whether couples therapy is even safe to attempt.
Join Lisa Sonni & Dr. Peter Salerno in Boston, MA November 13-15, 2026 here: https://lisasonni.com/unbreakable-and-irreplaceable/
Support the show
This is the podcast they don't want you listening to.
👉 Find me at lisasonni.com
Book A Session with Lisa
Join my online survivor community called She Rises Collective where we are breaking free, rebuilding and dismantling patriarchy.
Follow on IG
Watch on YouTube
Get My Books Here
New episodes drop every Tuesday.
Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth - and remember:
You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.
47 min
March 10 Why Women End Up Doing Everything in Relationships with Terri Cole | S3E10
Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!
For years, women have been told they’re codependent. Too attached, too emotional, too responsible for everyone else’s feelings. And a lot of you have worn that label like proof that something is wrong with you.
So I brought on Terri Cole, licensed psychotherapist, boundary expert, and the voice behind “high-functioning codependency,” to talk about what this word actually means, how it gets misused, and why it can erase power, context, and safety when we’re talking about emotionally unsafe men.
We get into self-abandonment, the auto-yes, the low-grade resentment that never seems to have a clear source, and the way “being the capable one” can turn into a full-time job you never applied for. We also talk about boundaries in real life, what changes when someone is toxic or controlling, and why some women don’t recognize themselves in the classic codependency story even when they’re exhausted, overextended, and carrying everything.
Terri also shares the definition she uses, why she coined the term high-functioning codependency, and the small daily shifts that start giving you your life back.
Resources she shared:
boundaryquiz.com
https://www.terricole.com/btc/
Join Lisa Sonni & Dr. Peter Salerno in Boston, MA November 13-15, 2026 here: https://lisasonni.com/unbreakable-and-irreplaceable/
Support the show
This is the podcast they don't want you listening to.
👉 Find me at lisasonni.com
Book A Session with Lisa
Join my online survivor community called She Rises Collective where we are breaking free, rebuilding and dismantling patriarchy.
Follow on IG
Watch on YouTube
Get My Books Here
New episodes drop every Tuesday.
Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth - and remember:
You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.
48 min
March 03 How The Manosphere Is Teaching Men to Abuse with Rafael Gomez | S3EP9
Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!
The Manosphere isn’t “just podcasts.” It’s a curriculum teaching men how to destabilize, dominate, and call it leadership.

If you’ve ever sat across from a man who suddenly started talking about “alpha” energy, final decision-making power, or how you “owe” him sex… you’re not imagining the shift.

Something changed…and it likely wasn’t you.

In this conversation, Lisa sits down with Rafael Gomez, host of Women on Men, to expose how red pill ideology repackages abuse as masculinity. They unpack negging, withdrawal as control, sexual entitlement, and the quiet conditioning that teaches men to see relationships as power struggles instead of partnerships. Rafael shares what he’s seeing firsthand: men being fed insecurity, calling it strength, and sabotaging their own relationships in the process.

Together, Lisa and Rafael are naming the systems hurting everyone — including the men trapped inside them.

Real masculinity is integrity, emotional maturity, and the courage to build something equal.
When we tell the truth about what’s happening, we stop internalizing it.

And that’s where your power comes back.
Join Lisa Sonni & Dr. Peter Salerno in Boston, MA November 13-15, 2026 here: https://lisasonni.com/unbreakable-and-irreplaceable/
Support the show
This is the podcast they don't want you listening to.
👉 Find me at lisasonni.com
Book A Session with Lisa
Join my online survivor community called She Rises Collective where we are breaking free, rebuilding and dismantling patriarchy.
Follow on IG
Watch on YouTube
Get My Books Here
New episodes drop every Tuesday.
Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth - and remember:
You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.
52 min