The Loving Truth

How can I fix our marriage if he doesn’t think anything is wrong? What can I do if my needs aren’t being met by my partner? What information should I share with my kids about our divorce?

In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll hear from three callers who are stuck at an impasse and struggling to move forward. Together we’ll get clear about what’s necessary to make a change and how to take the first step.

What You’ll Learn In This Episode:

00:55 - She wants to work on the marriage, but he says it’s “fine”
04:46 - Your husband is NOT a jerk…
07:55 - He wants physical connection, but she needs emotional connection first
11:20 - Who should make the first move? 
16:52 - They’re getting divorced: What information should they share with their kids?
20:36 - What your children feel TODAY is not how they’ll feel FOREVER
26:16 - The better you do *this* one thing, the smoother your relationships will be

Mentioned In This Episode:

Struggling to decide whether to stay or go in your marriage and you’re serious about finding that answer?

Book a Truth & Clarity Session with a member of my team. We’ll discuss where you are in your marriage and explore if there’s a fit for you and I to work together so you can make - and execute - the RIGHT decision for YOU and your marriage.

When one or both partners in a marriage is neurodivergent, you face quite unique challenges…  In this episode, I’m joined by Dayna Abraham to explore neurodivergent marriage and more!

Now, you don’t need a diagnosis of ADHD, OCD, autism, etc. to enjoy this episode… rather, Dayna explains how learning to communicate better with your partner is actually about understanding them (and yourself!) better - neurodivergent or otherwise. 

You’ll also learn about neurodivergent labels & diagnoses, the wide variety of neurodivergent experience, how neurodivergence can impact marital intimacy & affection, and how you might build better systems & processes within a neurodivergent marriage. Plus, Dayna shares her own framework for thriving inside a marriage with one or both neurodivergent partners. (This framework applies to parenting, business, and more!)

What You’ll Learn In This Episode:

01:40 - The difference between a label & a diagnosis
06:59 - Neurodivergent people receive 10X more negative feedback…
11:45 - The female experience of being neurodivergent
15:28 - What to do if you think your partner is neurodivergent 
23:20 - How to NOT take your partner’s neurodivergence personally
27:54 - Neurodivergence, intimacy & affection
31:08 - How to build systems & processes in a neurodivergent marriage
40:40 - Dayna’s frameworks for neurodivergent parenting, marriage & more
48:38 - Okay, radical acceptance… but what about unacceptable behavior? 
57:44 - The most beautiful part of Dayna’s neurodivergent marriage

Mentioned In This Episode:

Struggling to decide whether to stay or go in your marriage and you’re serious about finding that answer?

Book a Truth & Clarity Session with a member of my team. We’ll discuss where you are in your marriage and explore if there’s a fit for you and I to work together so you can make - and execute - the RIGHT decision for YOU and your marriage.

Feeling a loss of attraction and desire for your partner is very common… even when you’re recovering your marriage to a healthy place. 

Many of us think that a “spicy” marriage (or an intimate connection) is what’s lost to our youthful naivety or the “magic” of something new. But it’s actually about biology. 

In this episode, I’m going to get a little nerdy and talk about healthy hormones, PLUS 4 practical ways you can invite desire into your marriage and your life.

What You’ll Learn In This Episode:

4:53 - We can’t talk about desire without talking about your hormones 
8:16 - Your body needs these 3 things to feel desire
12:36 - Does your relationship still feel… fun?
15:57 - The fastest way to connect with your partner
18:31 - Desire isn’t something you “make” happen
21:15 - Rekindling desire is about action & effort

Mentioned In This Episode:

Struggling to decide whether to stay or go in your marriage and you’re serious about finding that answer?

Book a Truth & Clarity Session with a member of my team. We’ll discuss where you are in your marriage and explore if there’s a fit for you and I to work together so you can make - and execute - the RIGHT decision for YOU and your marriage.

When’s the last time you felt truly heard by your partner? When’s the last time you enjoyed a serious conversation together… or agreed on a solution after an argument? 

Errors in communication are the most common problem I see with unhappy couples - because men and women communicate differently! And we often communicate for very different reasons. 

In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, we’ll explore the art of communicating within a heterosexual partnership, and I’ll provide 4 tips for more effective communication between men and women.

What You’ll Learn In This Episode:

• 0:54 - Women communicate to build connection (men do not)
• 4:49 - Men & women solve problems in different ways
• 6:22 - It’s not about who does it “right” & who does it “wrong” 
• 10:28 - Can you be braver (and bolder) with your communication boundaries? 
• 14:10 - Listen better by asking THIS question
• 16:05 - The #1 reason happy couples are actually happy

Mentioned In It’s Time for a Different Conversation in Your Marriage
Struggling to decide whether to stay or go in your marriage? Book a Truth & Clarity Session.

Struggling to decide whether to stay or go in your marriage and you’re serious about finding that answer?

Book a Truth & Clarity Session with a member of my team. We’ll discuss where you are in your marriage and explore if there’s a fit for you and I to work together so you can make - and execute - the RIGHT decision for YOU and your marriage.

How do I know if my spouse is genuinely changing or not? Can I trust his new good behavior will last? What can we do if my husband wants to open our marriage and I’m not sure? How do I move forward after my husband’s emotional affair with a coworker? 

In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll hear from three callers who want to understand how to encourage positive changes to make a marriage last, what to do when a partner comes out as bisexual, and how to move forward after an emotional affair.

3:13 - How to appreciate the good things he does to encourage lasting change
8:24 - Her husband wants to open their marriage - does she? 
10:03 - When you both want to feel seen and accepted (but neither of you does)
14:04 - The reality of emotional affairs (i.e. The Danger Zone)
18:13 - It’s not about the other woman
20:51 - What’s really going on when things go “bad”

Mentioned In Q&A: New "Good" Behavior, Emotional Affairs and an Open Marriage

Struggling to decide whether to stay or go in your marriage? Book a Truth & Clarity Session.

If you have a question you’d like me to answer on the podcast, leave me a voice message at 727-537-0359.

Struggling to decide whether to stay or go in your marriage and you’re serious about finding that answer?

Book a Truth & Clarity Session with a member of my team. We’ll discuss where you are in your marriage and explore if there’s a fit for you and I to work together so you can make - and execute - the RIGHT decision for YOU and your marriage.

Men and women communicate very differently and for very different reasons. And if you don’t understand how and why, it’ll cause problems that strain your relationship. So what do you need to know and do differently to communicate better in your marriage

In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll learn about why men and women communicate differently, why it can cause issues, and the brain chemistry involved. I’ll also teach you four things you can do to improve the communication between you and your partner.

00:54 - Ways in which men and women communicate differently and the reasons behind it

7:15 - How to be more direct in your communication with your husband (without coming across like a bitch)

10:20 - Two ways to be braver in your marriage and how they help your partner show up better inside the relationship

12:33 - An example of how understanding one another makes communication easier in marriage

14:10 - How to listen better when your partner is ready to share something with you

Mentioned In Four Ways to Improve Communication Between You and Your Spouse

Book a Truth & Clarity Session

Struggling to decide whether to stay or go in your marriage and you’re serious about finding that answer?

Book a Truth & Clarity Session with a member of my team. We’ll discuss where you are in your marriage and explore if there’s a fit for you and I to work together so you can make - and execute - the RIGHT decision for YOU and your marriage.

You know how each person can see something different when looking at the same piece of art? Perspective is the same way.

Your perspective is uniquely yours, and it’s built through belief which is shaped in the first few years of your life by multiple things like your environment and the people in it. In that way, your beliefs are also like art, bringing together multiple elements to create the big picture that is you. But, if you’re not careful, some beliefs you hold can play a part in destroying any relationship you have.

In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll hear about the one belief you might have that can ruin almost any relationship. You’ll learn a simple thing you can do to become a little more conscious in all of your relationships and discover how this subtle shift can improve your marriage

00:25 - The lost art that’s affecting your relationships

2:49 - A couple of reasons why you argue with others over perspective

4:30 - The problem with the concept of right versus wrong

6:37 - The benefits of looking at things in your relationships through the lens of perspective

8:57 - What happens when you’re simply curious about your partner’s perspective

Mentioned In The One Belief That Will Ruin Any Relationship

Stay or Go? By Sharon Pope

Struggling to decide whether to stay or go in your marriage and you’re serious about finding that answer?

Book a Truth & Clarity Session with a member of my team. We’ll discuss where you are in your marriage and explore if there’s a fit for you and I to work together so you can make - and execute - the RIGHT decision for YOU and your marriage.

Feeling frustrated by the same interactions and experiences with your partner? Perhaps you and your spouse are having the same arguments over and over again, or you’re still not affectionate with each other.

How will your life look and feel a year from now, though, if you do nothing different? You might think you know the answer, but you’ll only be partly right.

In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll learn about two reasons why your life won’t be the same next year if you don’t do things differently. I’ll also give you suggestions on how to change your approach to the problems in your marriage so that it has a chance to evolve into something better.

1:10 - The first (and most important) reason why your life a year from now won’t still be the same by doing nothing different

3:49 - The one inevitability that means things won’t be different for you next year

5:22 - A suggestion for doing something different that puts you in the fast lane to change

6:53 - The assumption you need to drop to get things moving in a different direction

8:03 - One of the more powerful things you can do that most people resist (at least at first)

10:01 - How to get out of the inertia and implement the suggestion of your choice

11:45 - The result if you remain passive and ignore the rumble strip in your marriage

Mentioned In What Will Life Be Like One Year From Now (If You Do Nothing Different)?

Stay or Go? By Sharon Pope

Struggling to decide whether to stay or go in your marriage and you’re serious about finding that answer?

Book a Truth & Clarity Session with a member of my team. We’ll discuss where you are in your marriage and explore if there’s a fit for you and I to work together so you can make - and execute - the RIGHT decision for YOU and your marriage.

If you need to end a relationship, you want to try to do it in the most loving and peaceful way possible. This is something I say often, but there’s one problem with it: not everyone wants to be loving and peaceful about separating.

One of my clients, parent coach Julie Zivah, finds herself in a highly contentious divorce with her husband of 22 years. Yet she has found a way to keep her peace while still going through the process. And she wanted to be on the podcast to take us through her journey as someone in a high-conflict divorce.

In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll hear about how Julie’s divorce has gone thus far and how she’s learned to stay calm and zen. You’ll learn about the hard realizations she’s had about her relationship with her husband and kids, the tools she’s used to help navigate her situation mentally and emotionally, and her supportive mindset and approach as her family’s dynamic continues to be in transition.

2:20 - Julie describes where she was mentally and emotionally in her marriage when we started working together

5:40 - How Julie got to the decision to end her relationship with her husband

8:35 - Does Julie ever get cold feet and feel tempted to change her mind?

11:21 - The moment Julie knew her divorce wasn’t going to be loving and peaceful (and an important side note about her approach to this conversation)

14:15 - Julie shares one of the hardest realizations in this process and how her relationship with her kids has changed

21:57 - The importance of a dependable adult for kids and teaching your kids how to manage difficult people

24:05 - How Julie’s experience has changed her parent coaching practice

26:03 - Collaborative divorce proceedings with a high-conflict personality and what happened when Julie switched to a non-collaborative process

31:09 - The tool that helps Julie do things with love and kindness while going through a difficult divorce

34:40 - How Julie kept her peace when things got really tough and she had moments of doubt

38:47 - The importance of using helpful tools when you’re not in crisis

40:14 - Julie’s advice if you suspect a high-conflict separation on the horizon

46:01 - Where Julie’s relationships with her partner and kids stand today

Mentioned In How to Keep Your Peace Through a High-Conflict Divorce

High Conflict Institute

Splitting and Don’t Alienate the Kids! by Bill Eddy

Book a Truth & Clarity Session

Struggling to decide whether to stay or go in your marriage and you’re serious about finding that answer?

Book a Truth & Clarity Session with a member of my team. We’ll discuss where you are in your marriage and explore if there’s a fit for you and I to work together so you can make - and execute - the RIGHT decision for YOU and your marriage.

Are you avoiding spending time alone with your partner? Do you feel like you’ve lost momentum on going forward with your divorce decision after talking about it with your spouse? I answered a couple of questions from Tiffany and another caller who found themselves in these situations.

In this episode of The Loving Truth podcast, you’ll hear about how you get to a place of disconnection in your marriage and how the way you approach the divorce conversation with your partner can cause you to waver on your decision. I’ll also teach you how to build your muscle of discomfort to help you stop avoiding your husband and how you can move the separation process along as smoothly as possible.

0:40 - A choice between befriending a little discomfort or a lifetime of avoiding your husband

4:08 - Why sometimes you avoid being alone with your partner

5:35 - How to start breaking down the buffers you’ve become used to in your relationship

9:48 - A common thing that happens in marriages with kids

12:45 - Why the conversation to end your marriage is just the first of many

16:56 - The importance of how you enter a conversation with your partner about separation

18:49 - How to move the separation and divorce process along as peacefully and loving as possible

Mentioned In Avoiding Time Alone and a Divorce Discussion Gone Wrong

Have a Question? Leave Me a Voicemail Message at 727-537-0359.

Book a Truth & Clarity Session

Struggling to decide whether to stay or go in your marriage and you’re serious about finding that answer?

Book a Truth & Clarity Session with a member of my team. We’ll discuss where you are in your marriage and explore if there’s a fit for you and I to work together so you can make - and execute - the RIGHT decision for YOU and your marriage.