UNDERSTANDABLE

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Ladies & Gentlemen, welcome to today’s episode!

Here’s the thing: We all hate conflict in our relationships.

And it’s these days when we fight with the person we love most, that hurt us and make us suffer the most.

But what if there is a way to stop fighting in our relationships?

Even prevent fights before they happen?

In this episode, I will introduce you to an often forgotten approach to achieve exactly that: A relationship with less fighting & conflict.

Plus, as a bonus, in the end of the video, I demonstrate this solution in a live roleplay with a Custom GPT I built.

► Links and Resources:

Video People Pleasing and How Conflict Heals Relationships: https://youtu.be/ZhExIeU3Bys?si=tU5VgGUQz2SaQJIK

Article Michael Lukas Moeller: https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_Lukas_Moeller

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Spotify: ⁠

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Apple Podcasts: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Amazon Music:

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► Episode Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

00:56 Why We’re Fighting

04:00 The Toxic Fighting Cycle

08:49 How A Healthy Relationship Looks Like

13:15 Where The Disconnection Happens

15:39 The Real, Mutual Talk

17:41 “Zwiegespräch” Dialogue

20:50 Nonviolent Communication

► Reach Out To Me :)

E-Mail: [email protected]

► Hi, my name is Robert! I create videos about childhood trauma & attachment theory.

My content aims to help you transform trauma-driven reactions that block you, so you can embrace a life full of happiness, safe & loving relationships, and self-confidence. :)

► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education.

I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

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► Download the Free Workbook full of Re-Regulation Resources & Writing techniques:

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Ladies & Gentlemen, welcome to today’s episode, where we talk about a surprisingly simple technique to resolve conflict like a secure person.

We explore why we fight and how our attachment style is linked to that.

But more importantly, I’ll show you a simple technique that works to handle conflict like a secure person.

And I demonstrate this solution in a live roleplay with a Custom GPT I built.

► Links and Resources:

Nonviolent Communication Book:

https://amzn.to/4nu5b9Z *Ad

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Spotify: ⁠

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Apple Podcasts: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

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► Episode Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

01:14 Why We Fight

03:58 Conflict and Insecure Attachment

11:55 Escalation Scale

16:28 About The Technique

16:44 Nonviolent Communication

21:22 Live Roleplay

30:46 Live Roleplay Results

► Reach Out To Me :)

E-Mail: [email protected]

► Hi, my name is Robert! I create videos about childhood trauma & attachment theory.

My content aims to help you transform trauma-driven reactions that block you, so you can embrace a life full of happiness, safe & loving relationships, and self-confidence. :)

► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education.

I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

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► Download the Free Workbook full of Re-Regulation Resources & Writing techniques:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://understandable.net/book/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠(Ad)

Ladies & Gentlemen, welcome to today’s episode, where we talk about 10 Signs That Immediately Tell You Someone Is a Covert Narcissist.

Grandiose narcissists are often more obvious to spot, but there is another type that is more hidden.

We talk about what covert narcissism is,

10 signs how you can spot one that I ranked from most obvious to least obvious, and what to do if you identify one.

► Links and Resources:

HSP and Narcissists Episode:

https://youtu.be/4iVbi9euL3k?si=TVaaPCU44ay8JH6F

Narcissism Phenotypes Paper: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/40679663_Pathological_Narcissism_and_Narcissistic_Personality_Disorder

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Spotify: ⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2gaheQLxBwByM9txVzlpI6⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Apple Podcasts: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Amazon Music:

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► Episode Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

01:12 Covert Narcissism Vs. “Regular” Narcissism

04:43 Sign 1: They Are Hypersensitive To Any Kind Of Criticism

06:27 Sign 2: They Are Chronic Neurotics

07:44 Sign 3: They Are Anti-Social

09:53 Sign 4: They Don’t Want Others To Succeed

11:08 Sign 5: They Are Far Up On The Spectrum Of Judging

12:39 Sign 6: Aggression Comes Out Of The Backdoor

14:56 Sign 7: The Play The Moral Victim

17:09 Sign 8: They Strut Around But Don’t Take The Risks

19:24: Sign 9: Grandiosity Comes Out Of The Backdoor

20:47 Sign 10: They Weaponize Your Insecurity

23:02 What To Do, If You’re In A Relationship With A Covert Narcissist?

► Reach Out To Me :)

E-Mail: [email protected]

► Hi, my name is Robert! I create videos about childhood trauma & attachment theory.

My content aims to help you transform trauma-driven reactions that block you, so you can embrace a life full of happiness, safe & loving relationships, and self-confidence. :)

► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education.

I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

► Start Our Premium Course Trial:

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► Download the Free Workbook full of Re-Regulation Resources & Writing techniques:

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Ladies & Gentlemen, welcome to today’s episode, where we talk about 8 life areas to declutter to calm chaos & overwhelm and release emotional baggage

In the beginning we discuss the controversial if trauma is responsible for a lot of the clutter in our life

And we explore in depth all of the 8 areas and come up with solutions to declutter

► Links and Resources:

Traumatic and stressful life events in hoarding article: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC8312593/

Hoarding and Trauma article: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S2211364917301793

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Spotify: ⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2gaheQLxBwByM9txVzlpI6⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Apple Podcasts: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Amazon Music:

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► Episode Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

00:46 Clutter And Trauma

10:32 Household Clutter

13:58 Time/Capacity Clutter

16:23 Career Clutter

19:04 Financial Clutter

21:56 Physical Health Clutter

25:16 Relationship Clutter

28:24 Emotional Clutter

36:05 Mental Clutter

► Reach Out To Me :)

E-Mail: [email protected]

► Hi, my name is Robert! I create videos about childhood trauma & attachment theory.

My content aims to help you transform trauma-driven reactions that block you, so you can embrace a life full of happiness, safe & loving relationships, and self-confidence. :)

► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education.

I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

► Start Our Premium Course Trial:

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► Download the Free Workbook full of Re-Regulation Resources & Writing techniques:

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While working with 4 different therapists in the past years, I’ve learned a ton of powerful self-care habits.

Here are my top 7, ranked from least to most impact, to reclaim self-worth.

But surprisingly, habits 6 and 7 are the simplest effective at the same time.

► Links and Resources:

Toxic Shame Episode:

https://youtu.be/qqDURsvDZmM?si=iQdhxHnDYiQ_o4GS

► Subscribe On Your Favorite Platform!

YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGiJdF0yeTyRJanW_uSICDw?sub_confirmation=1⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Spotify: ⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2gaheQLxBwByM9txVzlpI6⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Apple Podcasts: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Amazon Music:

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► Episode Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

00:33 Habit 1: Wordless Mirror-Work

2:53 Habit 2: Re-Regulation Tools & Resources

06:01 Habit 3: Express Needs

08:31 Habit 4: Wear Clothes That Feel Like You

09:59 Habit 5: Daily Boundary Check-In

11:43 Habit 6: Use A Grounding Reminder App

13:31 Habit 7: Set A Reminder For Your Sense Of Self

► Reach Out To Me :)

E-Mail: [email protected]

► Hi, my name is Robert! I create videos about childhood trauma & attachment theory.

My content aims to help you transform trauma-driven reactions that block you, so you can embrace a life full of happiness, safe & loving relationships, and self-confidence. :)

► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education.

I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

► Start Our Premium Course Trial:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://understandable.net/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠(Ad)

► Download the Free Workbook full of Re-Regulation Resources & Writing techniques:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://understandable.net/book/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠(Ad)

If your relationships look like this: One moment you're deeply connected — the next, you're pulling away and don't want any contact with that person.

Or you have the feeling that you are somehow addicted and dependent on another person.

This isn’t just drama.

But it’s the emotional rollercoaster of trauma bonding — a pattern that’s especially common if you grew up with chaos, neglect, or emotional unpredictability.

In this video, we’ll explore why love can feel like a roller coaster

How all this is linked to an anxious, avoidant or disorganized attachment style

Which role narcissistic abuse plays in all of that

and how to finally break free from the chaos… to master real, secure connection — even if you never saw that growing up.

► Links and Resources:

10 Signs of a Fearful-Avoidant Attachment Style: https://youtu.be/V5Nn_XOHFX8?si=Hakj_BVayQasc134

Intermittent Reinforcement Article: https://www.catharticspacecounseling.com/blog/stuck-in-a-toxic-cycle-this-psychological-pattern-might-be-why

Trauma Bonding Video By Tim Fletcher: https://www.youtube.com/live/xIf4uJ94r3o?si=4C1KYflrBZs_dxtM

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YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGiJdF0yeTyRJanW_uSICDw?sub_confirmation=1⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Spotify: ⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2gaheQLxBwByM9txVzlpI6⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Apple Podcasts: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Amazon Music:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://music.amazon.de/podcasts/ee3580cb-61c5-4aa1-9ad4-1204014078e7/understandable⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

► Episode Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

01:02 What is Trauma Bonding?

04:33 How Childhood Trauma Creates This Pattern

07:06 The Role of The Narcissist

09:47 Challenges in Breaking Free

11:48 How To Rebuild Healthy Relationships After a Chaotic Childhood

12:00 Step 1: Clarity For The Trauma-Bond

13:05 Step 2: Get Away From Any Toxic Relationship

13:53 Step 3: Understand What A "Healthy" Partner Is

15:07 Step 4: Find The Right People For You Healing

16:00 Step 5: Dance The Connection/Autonomy Dance

► Reach Out To Me :)

E-Mail: [email protected]

► Hi, my name is Robert! I create videos about childhood trauma & attachment theory.

My content aims to help you transform trauma-driven reactions that block you, so you can embrace a life full of happiness, safe & loving relationships, and self-confidence. :)

► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education.

I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

► Start Our Premium Course Trial:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://understandable.net/⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠(Ad)

► Download the Free Workbook full of Re-Regulation Resources & Writing techniques:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://understandable.net/book/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠(Ad)

If you're on social media these days, everyone tells you the same thing: 'Just listen to your gut feeling.'

But I want to say the opposite is true.

Because what if your strongest intuition — your so-called gut feeling — is actually coming out of a past wound?

This is true for everyone who experienced childhood trauma.

In this video, I’ll reveal to you 7 clear signs that it’s trauma — not your intuition — speaking.

My goal is that after this video you can tell for sure if it's your gut instinct speaking, or a past trauma reaction.

Plus, I’ll share some of the best tools, techniques, and strategies I’ve learned over four years of therapy to help you reconnect with your true gut instinct.

► Links and Resources:

Commitment Issues Video:

https://youtu.be/SUECZtfGkEM?si=0NIn5fjYfkHL1SAN

Somatic Symptoms Video:

https://youtu.be/lwhrWvjcOq0?si=gEKaF2NUR899j1mL

Hypervigilance Video:

https://youtu.be/Mhoa6_53StI?si=B07c4KL8NprA8B-S

Neuroception Article: https://khironclinics.com/blog/polyvagal-theory-neuroception-the-fundament-of-feeling/

► Subscribe On Your Favorite Platform!

YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGiJdF0yeTyRJanW_uSICDw?sub_confirmation=1⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Spotify: ⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2gaheQLxBwByM9txVzlpI6⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Apple Podcasts: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Amazon Music:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://music.amazon.de/podcasts/ee3580cb-61c5-4aa1-9ad4-1204014078e7/understandable⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

► Episode Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

01:00 Personal Story

02:47 Real Gut Feeling: Location & Sensation Breakdown

05:28 Why You Can’t Trust Your Gut Feeling

08:14 Sign 1: You Overthink And Expect The Worst, Even When Things Are Calm

09:16 Sign 2: You Struggle To Trust People, Even If They've Never Hurt You

10:52 Sign 3: You're Afraid They Might Leave, Even If Nothing's Wrong

11:55 Sign 4: You Overreact To Small Things, And It Feels Huge In The Moment

12:46 Sign 5: You're Always On Alert, Even When There's No Visible Threat

13:55 Sign 6: You Avoid People Or Places, And You're Not Sure Why

15:44 Sign 7: You Feel Uneasy When Things Are Actually Calm

17:16 How To Reconnect With Your Real Intuition

19:32 Tools, Skills & Resources For Regulating Trauma Responses

► Reach Out To Me :)

E-Mail: [email protected]

► Hi, my name is Robert! I create videos about childhood trauma & attachment theory.

My content aims to help you transform trauma-driven reactions that block you, so you can embrace a life full of happiness, safe & loving relationships, and self-confidence. :)

► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education.

I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

► Start Our Premium Course Trial: https://understandable.net/ (Ad)

► Download the Free Workbook full of Re-Regulation Resources & Writing techniques: https://understandable.net/book/ (Ad)

Are you in this situation right now, where you desperately wish nothing more, than that a specific person in your life would change?Maybe your partner who keeps shutting down emotionally?Your dad who’s slowly destroying himself with unhealthy habits?Or Your daughter making decisions that feel absolutely impossible to watch?If you’re feeling the urge right now that’s it’s your job to fix them, to somehow save them — then this episode is for you.Because here’s the honest truth upfront:You can’t change them. And you shouldn’t try.I know that might feel like giving up.But you can do something instead - and this is what we’re talking about in this video.

► Links and Resources:

Between Stimulus and Response Lies Our Freedom Episode: https://youtu.be/XGJFXLEfdpc?si=zBO77fGiQViBEmTW

► Subscribe On Your Favorite Platform!

YouTube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGiJdF0yeTyRJanW_uSICDw?sub_confirmation=1⁠

Spotify: ⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2gaheQLxBwByM9txVzlpI6

Apple Podcasts: ⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905

Amazon Music: ⁠https://music.amazon.de/podcasts/ee3580cb-61c5-4aa1-9ad4-1204014078e7/understandable⁠

► Episode Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

00:52 3 Saver Roles You Play, When Trying To Fix Someone You Love

05:20 Why It Was Never Your Job To “Fix” Them

06:47 Trying To Fix Someone? Try These 3 Steps!

13:19 Final Thoughts

► Reach Out To Me :)

E-Mail: [email protected]

► Hi, my name is Robert! I create videos about childhood trauma & attachment theory. My content aims to help you transform trauma-driven reactions that block you, so you can embrace a life full of happiness, safe & loving relationships, and self-confidence. :)

► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education.I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

► Start Our Premium Course Trial:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://understandable.net/⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠(Ad)

► Download the Free Workbook full of Re-Regulation Resources & Writing techniques:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://understandable.net/book/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠(Ad)

Sometimes our emotional world, feels like a battlefield.

So do you often feel like you’re fighting an invisible war inside your own body?

Like sounds, lights, and emotions are too much?

No one might see it, BUT you’re not alone.

This is sensory overload caused by complex trauma which causes you to be easily triggered, feeling overwhelm ed and burned out.

In this video, we’ll break down why your nervous system feels like a battlefield,

what the causes behind your overwhelm and shutdown are

and a ton of resources I collected during years of therapy that can help you surviving and calm you down.

► Links and Resources:

Hypervigilance Episode:

https://youtu.be/Mhoa6_53StI

HSP vs. ASD Episode:

https://youtu.be/sib1ok3a6-w?si=E2gIexDhZedOh9VN

Sensory Overload and PTSD Paper: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9720153

► Subscribe On Your Favorite Platform!

YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGiJdF0yeTyRJanW_uSICDw?sub_confirmation=1⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Spotify: ⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2gaheQLxBwByM9txVzlpI6⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Apple Podcasts: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Amazon Music:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://music.amazon.de/podcasts/ee3580cb-61c5-4aa1-9ad4-1204014078e7/understandable⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

► Episode Timestamps:

00:00

00:52 Personal Story

02:09 Understanding CPTSD And Sensory Overload

04:50 CPTSD Vs. Neurodivergence Vs. Sensory Sensitivity

08:25 Identifying Your Unique Triggers

10:32 Re-Regulation & Grounding Techniques

10:53 Technique 1: The 5-4-3-2-1 Technique

11:17 Technique 2: Movement Skills

11:58 Technique 3: Shower Technique

12:55 Technique 4: Emergency Exit Technique

13:33 Sensory Overwhelm Self-Care Routines

14:05 Routine 1: Create A Low-Stimulation Environment

15:23 Routine 2: Nervous System Hygiene = Daily Self-Care

16:58 Routine 3: Communicate Your Sensory Needs & Set Boundaries

18:24 Long Term Healing

► Reach Out To Me :)

E-Mail: [email protected]

► Hi, my name is Robert! I create videos about childhood trauma & attachment theory.

My content aims to help you transform trauma-driven reactions that block you, so you can embrace a life full of happiness, safe & loving relationships, and self-confidence. :)

► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education.

I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.

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There is one reason, why so many of us are feeling not good enough.

No matter how much you achieve or how many people tell you otherwise, you still sometimes just want to disappear, because you're feeling so degraded and thinskinned.

But the thing is: That voice inside you that keeps saying, ‘You’re not enough’… it didn’t start with you.

You weren’t born believing that. It was planted there — and it’s been shaping the way you see yourself ever since.

And in today's video, we’re going to look at where that belief really comes from, what toxic shame actually is, how it can quietly control every area of your life without you even realizing it… and most importantly, what you can do to finally break free from it.

► Links and Resources:

Toxic Shame Episode:

https://youtu.be/9XpiOkHSpjI?si=Ndp7XgXXWlqMazoN

► Subscribe On Your Favorite Platform!

YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGiJdF0yeTyRJanW_uSICDw?sub_confirmation=1⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Spotify: ⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/2gaheQLxBwByM9txVzlpI6⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Apple Podcasts: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/understandable/id1399616905⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Amazon Music:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://music.amazon.de/podcasts/ee3580cb-61c5-4aa1-9ad4-1204014078e7/understandable⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

► Episode Timestamps:

00:00 Intro

01:05 Where “I’m Not Good Enough” Comes From

03:48 Toxic Shame: The Root Of It All

10:04 Why You Keep Ending Up In The Same Pain

11:33 How To Stop Feeling “Not Good Enough”

12:17 Step 1: Realize: It Was Never Your Fault!

13:01 Step 2: Replace Self-Criticism With Compassion

14:33 Step 3: Train Yourself To Interrupt The Cycle As Often As Possible

15:25 Step 4 : Create New Relationship Experiences

16:30 Step 5: Use Re-Regulation-Tools And Resources

► Reach Out To Me :)

E-Mail: [email protected]

► Hi, my name is Robert! I create videos about childhood trauma & attachment theory.

My content aims to help you transform trauma-driven reactions that block you, so you can embrace a life full of happiness, safe & loving relationships, and self-confidence. :)

► Disclaimer: None of the contents are therapeutic or medical recommendations. The contents are not to be understood as therapeutic-medical instructions and are neither intended as professional health advice nor as education.

I am not a health professional myself. My content is based on research and my personal experiences working with various therapists as a client for three years.